Lingerie on the Boat?

I’ll bet you’re curious now, as I get ready to divulge my secret negligee habits.  Do I always keep a few lacy numbers stowed away in the v-berth?  Or just pack a pretty pair for special occasions?  Truth is, I keep one key piece of lingerie on the boat at all times and use it every night we sleep in the v-berth.  What piece you might ask?  We’ll get there!

First, we have to talk about the sheets.  While the Captain and I don’t like to readily admit this, it’s sad but true.  Since we bought the boat back in 2013, we had been using the same tired out v-berth sheet the previous owners had used.  It was a regular flat cotton sheet, threadbare from years of wash and wear, that was simply cut in a few places to help it “fit” around our oddly-shaped v-berth mattress.

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That’s it.  Isn’t she a beauty?  

This nice ratty slit here was where we tucked it on either side to fit around the indention at the head of our mattress.

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Real fancy-like.  And, I hate to say, as long as we used that thing on the boat, letting it stare Phillip and I straight in the eye the second we stepped down the companionway stairs and scream to any newcomer aboard–“Hey!  Check out our old, ratty sheets!”–I never really captured a good picture of it.  I guess if you don’t really like the way something looks, you’re not really inclined to photograph it.  This was the best I could find.

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Notice how it’s all bunched up in places and how that ratty tear sits right in blaring view?  No matter how many times I would pull and tuck and pull and tuck, the sheet would always work itself back into bunches and split at that tear, revealing a big hunk of bright, yellow memory foam and our old grandma’s couch upholstery (which you can see on the settee cushions in the picture above).  When we had the upholstery on the boat re-done back in 2013, we only did the saloon settees and the aft-berth, not the v-berth, figuring it’s always covered with the sheet, so why bother?

Well, bother we didn’t.  For years.  We just kept washing and tucking and pulling and cursing that tired blue sheet until we decided enough was enough.  It was time to get some new sheets.  And, having gone several years with the low-rent slit-and-tuck routine, we wanted to have a set expertly fitted to our v-berth mattress.  I got a few recommendations for boat bed tailors from friends and finally got a drapery gal on the phone who claimed to have some experience tailoring fitted sheets for v-berths.  We took some measurements of our mattress and I sketched out a pretty good mockup of our mattress for her.

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After review, she said we should buy two king flat sheets (just in case one wasn’t enough) and she would create one fitted sheet out of those that would fit our v-berth mattress to a tee.  The drapery gal said she would need the mattresses to do it, though, to be sure the fit was right, and she expected it would cost around $50.00 in labor.  Not bad, we thought, other than the somewhat tedious mattress haul-out, but, aside from trying to do the sheet tailoring ourselves, it seemed to be the only option.  So, our next mission was to find some sheets.

Now, I would like to say that we did some research, poked around on some other cruising blogs and forums to find out which sheets really perform best in a marine environment.  But, we didn’t.  We just went to Bed, Bath & Beyond one day and started meandering around.  Phillip at least knew he wanted to try to find a high performance, synthetic blend as opposed to 100% cotton, to reduce moisture and odor retention, in other words, the wet and stinky factor.  Knowing very little about their reputation in the boating realm, we stumbled upon this Sheex brand that peaked our curiosity.  They were synthetic, durable and felt like cool silk.  We zipped open a package and couldn’t stop fondling them.  The product insert also showed they were engineered to meet all of the Captain’s high performance points.

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And, with a marketing pitch like this, they were hitting all of my high performance points, too.

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I was really starting to wonder about the power of these sheets … 

Most importantly, though, for whatever reason, on the day that we decided to pop into Bed, Bath & Beyond, the Sheex sets were 40% off.  How fortuitous!  We snagged a complete king set (flat and fitted sheets and two pillow cases) which typically would have been over $200 for around $130.  And, I was pleased to find after our purchase that the Sheex brand seems to be a pretty proven bedding product among boaters — Cruising World Sheex article HERE.  Score!  The stars were really lining up for us on this sheets project.  I couldn’t wait to get them to the boat to try them out.  My head was filled with visions of Phillip and I drifting away on cool, silky dreams.

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“How do you like the new sheets, Annie?”  

Why they’re just dreamy, Captain.  Positively dreamy.” 

I decided I couldn’t wait on drapery gal to see just how heavenly the new sheets would feel on the boat.  I had to whip them out for a test run, and I’m glad I did.  When I pulled out the fitted sheet on the boat, I noticed the elastic fitted rim went all the way around the entire sheet, not just at the four corners.  I started to think it might just fit on its own without any need for an involved and costly tailor job.  Even better!  I tucked and pulled and stretched the fitted sheet around, hoping for a small miracle, and I have to say, I got real close.

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The sheet stretched out smoothly everywhere except for the one oddly-placed indention at the head.  This one nagging little setback was ruining my whole dreamy vision.  I just needed something to pull the excess flap taut at this point to make it work.

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Of all the things we have troubleshooted and repaired on the boat, surely this was going to be an easy fix–just one little cinch point.  I went back to my old bag of tricks and started running through various hot-glue and staple options in my mind.  I kept thinking if I could just attach an elastic strap to the flappy part that would pull underneath and fasten to a button or hook or something, that would do the trick.  I was confident I could do this!  I didn’t need drapery gal or her magic sewing contraption.  I could do this!  I mulled over it, stewed on it, even dreamed about it, and then it came to me — lingerie!  The minute the idea struck me, I couldn’t wait to get back to the boat to try it out.  I took my one little key “piece” with me and set to it.

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Shhhh … don’t tell Captain!  I’m going to surprise him with lingerie on the boat!

So, what was the key piece?  The stretchy little clip-fasten device that I was sure was going to save our dreamy day?

A garter clip!

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Yep, this little guy.  I mean, he’s designed on one end to attach to hosiery without damaging it.  I figured that he would probably be able to do the same with Sheex.  Why not, right?  Plus, he’s stretchy and even has a hook already built in on the other end.  The grandma’s couch upholstery on the underside of our v-berth mattress has a lot of thick threading that I was sure a little bra hook could latch onto.  If not, there was the plastic webbed mold-prevention underlining that I could try to hook to as well.  All things that were already there on the boat, just waiting to be utilized.  So, I gave it a shot —

Just cinch and pull,

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then hook underneath, and

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Voila!

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A little bit of expert ruching and bunching and I thought it looked just about intentional.  Better than drapery gal could do I was sure of it!  I mean, look at that custom Sheex bedding!

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And, it all was made possible with a little piece of lingerie!  Thank you Monica Midnight for your vixen-like and versatile lingerie line!

How about you all?  Any of you out there a fan of the Sheex?  Or, have come up with some fancy bedding fixtures of your own?  Do tell!

 

And, thanks as always, to the many patrons who help make these posts just a little more possible through PATREON.

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Stranded Naked in the Bahamas??

I will be!  Soon!  Big announcement folks (cue that ratta-tatta news room sound) — this Little Sailor-that-Could is going to the Bahamas!  Not on our boat, not with the Captain and apparently (at times) not with clothes.  Say what?!?  That’s right.  Times are a-changin’!

To make a long story short (I know, I know, I’m not so good at that, but I’m really going to try!), around November of last year, the Captain and I, having just finished our pretty-involved solar panel project and chased down our baffling alternator aftermath, were itching to get our boat out for an extended stay on the hook to really enjoy our new solar input and make sure we wouldn’t have any trouble this time with the starting battery.  Thanksgiving was coming up, so we decided to use the holiday time to do what we do best–enjoy a nice, serene anchorage on our beautiful boat.

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It’s a tough job but someone’s got to do it.  

As you know, I had been piddling around on the aerial silks for a few months by then and when I mentioned our upcoming trip to my instructor, the completely unattractive and untalented, Garrett (this one’s for you ladies):

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he says, “Oh yeah, that reminds me, I’ve been meaning to tell you about Hanna.”

“Who?” I ask, wondering what’s so special about this Hanna chick.

“Hanna,” Garrett says.

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This chick.  Little did I know this fiery little redhead was about to turn my world upside down (literally).

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BAM!

At the time, I had been playing around on the silks for a few months and always made my way to the gym any time I wanted to get a silks session in.  I mean, you need like 30 feet of height to rig up a pair.  Where am I going to hang a set of my own?  I hope your gears are starting to turn, because I have to admit, had I not seen it myself, I’m not sure I would have ever thought of it on my own.

Hanna doesn’t just DO silks.  She does it … ON A SAILBOAT.

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Just when I thought sailboats couldn’t get any cooler …   I couldn’t get to her fast enough.  I Facebook stalked her, texted her, tracked the poor girl down.  I had to know where she got her magic “sailboat silks” and how she rigged them up.  Thankfully Hanna was way cool, she forgave the stalking and clued me in.  Her husband’s parents own a 47′ Beneteau and they had rigged her silks up on the boat using the whisker pole for the spinnaker.  While I didn’t think that would work on our boat (we don’t have our whisker pole mounted on the mast) I started tinkering around on our boat and was pretty sure I had figured out a way.  I mean, there’s a 50 foot mast, dozens of lines, rods and standing rigging to utilize.  If the boat can hoist and fly sails, surely it could hoist and fly me?!?  At least that’s what I told myself when I clicked, clicked, clicked, confirmed and bought my very own set of silks in hopes of hanging and playing on them during our turkey day trip.

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They arrived the day before our trip and were the first thing I packed on the boat.  I couldn’t believe I was going to be able to combine one of my favorite hobbies (the silks) with one of my favorite pastimes (lounging around on the boat).  Could life get any better?  Not in my book!  With the Captain’s blessing, I rigged my brand new set up for the very first time on our boat on Thanksgiving day and set to it!

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Now, did I get blown into the mast about five times?  You bet!  Did I care?  Not a bit!  Apparently, you need to have like ZERO wind to be able to do the silks on the boat, but it’s still very doable and easy gear to carry along and rig up.  I was happier than Richard Simmons at a fat camp.  It was one of my favorite days on the boat in all of 2014, even including our trip to the Keys.  It’s just such an incredible feeling to be virtually weightless, dangling, suspended over the anchorage.  Ahhhhh …  And, Ft. McRae is such a gorgeous place to “hang out” (ha ha).

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So, how does this lead to the Bahamas, or better yet being stranded and naked there?  Well, having sailed on her husband’s folks’ boat often, Hanna herself has a love for sailing and (I think) a little hankering to Captain her own boat one day.  A woman after my own heart!

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As such, she soon became a fan, follower and sponsor on the blog (thank you Hanna!), got a signed copy of my Salt of a Sailor book and passed word of it along to her inlaws hoping they, as sailors, would enjoy it as well.  (Thank you again, Hanna!)

Surprisingly, even after reading the book and knowing full well all of the incredibly stupid things I said, thought and did in it, Hanna’s inlaws still thought highly enough of my sail abilities, or my sea worthiness at least, to ask me to help crew their boat this July in the Abacos Regatta!

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Ben and Sara needed a few extra hands on deck during the July 4th and July 6th races, and they generously offered both Phillip and I a bunk on the boat if we would fly out to the Bahamas to help them with these two legs.  Sadly, Phillip had a conflict and could not make it, but after some serious talk, we decided it was an opportunity I could not and should not pass up.  So, I’m going to the Bahamas folks!

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I will fly into Marsh Harbour from Ft. Lauderdale, cab it up to Treasure Cay and then ferry over to Green Turtle Cay where Ben and Sarah are moored.  July 3rd is the famous Stranded Naked, Cheeseburger in Paradise party (although I’ve been advised we do wear clothes — bummer!).  I will help crew the July 4th Green Turtle race and the July 6th Treasure Cay to Guana Cay race then fly from Marsh Harbour back to Ft. Lauderdale.

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Red = cab.     Green = ferry.     Blue = sailing.

Thankfully, the room and board will be free on Ben and Sara’s spacious Benetau, the s/v Cheval — French for horse.  Perfect for me.

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With just a flight to cover for a multi-island sailing experience through the Bahamas with two incredibly traveled, generous sailors, it was an opportunity I simply could not turn down.  While Phillip and I plan to sail our boat there in the years to come, this will be a great way to get a flavor and feel of the Abacos and participate in their famous, party-style annual Regatta.  The decision was actually pretty easy.  Little did I know it would all develop from what I thought was simply a fun acrobatic hobby, which turned into a sailboat side-sport, but that’s the beauty of it all.  If you keep your mind and plans open to new places, pastimes and people, amazing opportunities can arise.  It’s okay if things get turned upside down.  If you just kind of go with it, you may find it was the best thing that ever happened to you.

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Thank you again Hanna for setting all of this up!  And, Ben and Sara, for your generosity (and bravery!) for inviting this tenacious little sailor aboard your vessel.  I … Cant … Wait!  I’ve had an empty passport for too long.  It’s time to stamp this baby up!  Even if I have to go it alone.  Life doesn’t wait for you.  Live while you can.  Bahamas … here I come!

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Many thanks to the patrons Hannas! who help make these posts just a little more possible through PATREON.

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The $3.49 Fix

November, 2014:

Okay, so it was $3.76 after tax, but the part–the one itsy bitsy, tiny little part that made our whole engine run–was three dollars and forty-nine cents.

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How long did it take us to figure that out?  I’d like to say it was only three hours and forty-nine minutes.  That would have been great, but it wasn’t.  It took weeks ….

If you recall, we were having occasional trouble getting our engine to crank after we installed and began using the new flexible solar panels on the bimini.

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Our “boat buddy focus group” surmised that perhaps the solar input from the panels was confusing the alternator and causing it not to re-charge the starting battery while we were motoring.  For this reason, we installed two handy on/off switches in the aft berth locker to turn the panels off while we were motoring in (HIGH!) hopes it would prevent the alleged “alternator confusion.”

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Apparently, though, our alternator isn’t the brightest part on the boat.  Sometimes it was confused; sometimes it was not.  The frustrating part was that the problem was intermittent.  Sometimes the engine would crank fine, other times it would not–inexplicably.  Like when you take your car to the shop so the mechanic can hear that ominous “clunking” sound and it won’t make it.  Bullocks!

The next time we took the boat out (after the on/off switches were installed and after we had turned them “off” while we were motored), and the engine again would not crank to bring us home, the Captain decided he’d had enough.  “We’re going to fix it today,” he said bright and early one Saturday morning, and I knew he wouldn’t stop until we had.  We donned some cloaks and pipes and decided to really roll up our sleeves to solve this mystery.

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What’s the best way to start troubleshooting?

Start taking crap apart!

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We traced every wire from the:

1.  Engine to the alternator,

2.  The alternator to the combiner (the device that decides which batteries (the house bank or the starting battery) need and get a charge from the engine),

3.  The combiner to the starting battery,

4.  The starting battery to the battery switch plate (where we turn on the batteries we want to use — house, starting or both combined, which is what we had been required to do when the starting battery alone wouldn’t allow us to crank),

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And finally:

5.  The switch plate to the starter.

Everything seemed to look good.  None of the wires were corroded, split or compromised and the connections looked solid.  We couldn’t understand why our seemingly “good” starting battery was not starting the engine.  If it was the battery, that was going to be a couple hundred bucks to replace, which was a better prospect than the alternator.  So, we decided to have the battery checked yet again.  We disconnected it and hauled it to three different battery-check places (Auto Zone and the like), where every time a highly-qualified battery specialist would come out and hook his or her little gismo machine up to our battery to run the necessary gismo calculations.

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I felt like I was watching Al from Quantum Leap bang around on his Ziggy handheld.  Beep, bo-dum, boomp.

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Each time, though (and three times total), the little Ziggy gismos came back showing our starting battery was good.

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And, I’m not sure what “EXP DECISION” means exactly other than “Expert Decision.”  I guess if they’re the alleged “experts,” (particularly when the consensus was the same among all of them), there’s really no reason to question it.  

So, we hauled our alleged “good” battery back to the boat still stumped by our crank problem.  We decided to replace the ring connectors on each end of the positive and negative wires to the battery just for good measure, and that’s when we discovered it.

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When Phillip was putting the post terminal connector back on the negative post he noticed it was loose.  No matter how hard he tried to tighten down on the nut, the connector couldn’t seem to achieve stable contact with the post.

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Apparently, it had been so worn from age, jostling and electric current that the center of the ring had been (for lack of a better word) eroded out so that no matter how tight we cranked the nut down on the bolt, you still couldn’t get a good, solid connection, particularly when it was lowered onto the post one way as opposed to flipped over and put on the other way.  By some stroke of luck, Phillip had put it back on the “other way” this time, which revealed the loose connection.  That’s when we had our Aha! moment.  We dropped everything and headed back to Auto Zone.

“One post terminal connection, please.”

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Three dollars and forty-nine cents later, we were mounting a snug new connector on the negative post certain this was going to be the easiest and cheapest fix we could have imagined.

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And, what happened next?

Mmmhhh-hmmm.  A mighty fine crank indeed!  We could tell instantly from the solid *CLICK* of the glow plugs that our starting battery was finally cranking out some solid juice.  Our engine roared to life!

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Now, why share this?  A simple post terminal connector replacement?  (Something we likely should have found pretty quickly.)  Because sometimes you just can’t see the simple fix initially.  With the new solar panels and the MPPT charge controllers, the new on/off switches and suspected alternator confusion, we were thinking the problem had to be more complicated.  But, lesson learned.  Most of the systems on the boat really are simple when you break them down and dissect them.  You just have to remember to “think simply” when troubleshooting.  I’ll never forget when we were trying to tell this ten-minute story to our buddy, Bottom-Job Brandon, and not three sentences in, he says:

“D’you check your post connectors?”

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Sharp guy, that Brandon (but a total story killer!).  Good thing I have a captive audience here!  Ha!

In all, we were pleased with the simple $3.49 fix (not counting our “labor” which I felt we earned the “loss” on for having overlooked something so basic — a boat will humble you real quick).  And, with the problem solved, the afternoon remaining and the wind picking up, we decided it was high time for a reward.  A last-minute run to the beach that day offered up one of our best impromptu kite sessions of the year against one of the most exquisite sunsets I have ever seen.

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That’s the thing about sailing, though, living near the water, which can be deadly one minute and overwhelmingly serene the next, and owning a boat.  You can start the day out cramped, coated in gunk and sweat and cursing everything about your bleeping boat, but once the project is complete, the accomplishment of it serves as your unparalleled reward and wipes away all of your previous frustration.  Suddenly the job is done and the day is still young.  Suddenly, nothing can bother you.  Life is still, and always will be, good.

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Many thanks to the patrons who help make these posts just a little more possible through PATREON.

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Solar Panels Bring the Blues

November 7-9, 2014:

After our racy rendezvous with the Sundowner crew in NOLA we were itching to get back out on our boat.  Now that we had our slick solar panels installed and (presumably) working, it was time to take them out for a test run, and what better time than the Pensacola Blue Angels Homecoming Show in November!  Several of our boat buddies were planning to get out for it, too, so it was quickly decided we would all get together for a massive raft-up.  We were five-deep at the Fort baby!

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From left to right:

1.  s/v Edelweiss, a well-kept 34′ Sabre, is often packed to the brim with the Armanis — two veterinarians with (now) three little ones in tow.  Did anyone call for a doctor?

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2.  s/v WindWalker, a 38′ Morgan, belongs to our trusted diesel engine mechanic, Johnny Walker (yes, that’s really his name, feel free to make all the associated Jim Bean, Jack Daniels jokes you’d like – he’s used to it), and his beautiful wife, Cindy.  (While this is my absolute favorite picture of Johnny and Cindy, don’t doubt it, rain, shine or cold – these two are always smiling!)

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3.  5 O’Clock, a 45′ Gulfstar, being the largest boat in the bunch often plays the role of “mothership” and is Captained by the only and only (you know this guy, he’s practically a celebrity in our world), Bottom-Job Brandon!  His rocking wife Christine and their (now) two little salty sailors round out the Hall crew.

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4.  s/v Plaintiff’s Rest and it’s fine-looking crew need no introduction, really.  Admit it, it’s only the best-looking boat in the bunch.

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5.  And, last but certainly not least, s/v Pan Dragon, a classic 36′ Pearson, is the pride and joy of our Broker-turned-Boat Buddy, Kevin, along with his incredibly entertaining wife, Laura, and their (now) two little ones seen here doing what they love to do — just “hang around” on the boat.

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I will say Phillip and I are exceptionally lucky to have fallen into such a fine group of sailing comrades when we purchased our boat back in 2013.  All of these Captains are sharp, talented sailors, each with a different area of expertise and each having proven their willingness time and again to help us out when we’ve found ourselves faced with a difficult boat project, and vice versa.  It’s also great to see the lot of them (which with all of the “nows” you might have recognized has recently grown – three new additions in 2015 alone!) get their boats out just about every weekend they are able with the whole crawling/cradle crew in tow.  I wouldn’t trust myself to keep a potted plant alive on the boat and here they bring their actual living, breathing, arms-and-legs munchkins aboard and show us all it can (and should) be done.  Families can cruise too.  They’re really impressive.

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Having all five of us lined up for this phenomenal weekend was a pretty epic feat.  But, when the Blue Angels come home, folks in Pensacola tend to get together for the event.  And, because the Blue Angels fly over their home base, the Pensacola Naval Air Station, for the homecoming show, we knew we would be right under the flight path anchored out near Ft. McRae.

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Here comes one now!   Zzzwweeehhhhh!

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See?  They flew right over us!  I kept trying to snap a cool shot of them coming by the boat but they kept breaking up, zipping around, looping and coming out of nowhere.  Those suckers are fast!  (And loud.)

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After about 84 missed shots (give or take), I finally caught them right where I wanted them.  Just overhead.  Check out the money shot!  BOOM.

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Hull No. 193, baby!  That’s us!  It looks like they’re only 20 feet above our mast.  While I can assure you, they are much higher, it doesn’t sound or feel like it when you’re watching them zip overhead.  Zwweeehhhh!!

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(Thank (and like) the Blue Angels Facebook team for the wicked pics!)

The show was jaw-dropping.  “Hold on to your drink, Cap’n!”

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First Mate rockin’ the rubbers!

They even put on an evening show (which they had not done in years) at the Naval Air Station.  We could catch glimpses of it (and hear the roar of the flaming big rig) from our boats.

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In all, it was an incredible weekend spent out on the boat with an amazing group of friends.

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And, best of all, the solar panels performed beautifully.  While we felt good about the Velcro adhesion, just to be safe I had taken some time back at the dock to manually stitch the panels on through their corner grommets with some green sail twine.

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You can see it on the corners here:

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Those flat little panels were expensive!  While it was highly unlikely, I wasn’t going to risk them flying off in some heavy winds.  They also proved extremely productive during our weekend out, pumping in (just about as we had expected) approximately 8 amps/hour.

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It was truly gratifying to watch our amp hours go DOWN during the day.  We were definitely pleased with the input and thrilled with the results of a long and tedious project.  Life was good … for a brief moment.  I swear that dern boat likes to toy with us sometimes.  Right when you think everything is running smoothly and everything about boating is awesome, the boat likes to throw a little wrench in things just to, you know, keep you guessing.  After our amazing weekend out on the boat, we woke Sunday to an awe-inspiring sky, sipped on coffee and decided we would ease the anchor up about mid-morning to enjoy a beautiful sail home.

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That was the plan anyway, until we tried to crank the engine and ———    Nothing, nada, flat line.  We couldn’t even get a click to turn the glow plugs on.  Our starting battery was completely dead.  The boat seemed to think it was funny.

It’s not funny, boat.

Luckily, on our boat, we can flip a switch to combine the house batteries with the starting battery, in situations like this, to pull from the house bank in order to crank the engine.  It’s not really good for the house batteries because they’re intended primarily for deep cycle use, but if you’ve got to crank, you’ve got to crank.  So, that’s what we did, and she started right up, which was a good sign.  That meant it wasn’t an engine problem just a battery problem, but it was still baffling.  What gives, boat?

Thankfully, we had a whole host of boat friends nearby to help us run through some things and troubleshoot.  Assuming our starting battery was still good (which, being only a year old, it was pretty safe to assume it was) the primary difference was the solar panels.  Once installed, they were essentially “on” all the time.  Meaning, any time they panels were in the sunlight, they were pumping in juice.  While the MPPT charge controllers regulate the influx of power to make sure the house batteries do not get overwhelmed by the solar input, one option kicked around the group was the possibility that the solar input may have overwhelmed the alternator and caused it not to re-charge the starting battery while we were motoring over to the Fort on Friday.

Back home, we took the starting battery the following week to several different Auto Zone type places to have it tested, and each time it passed with flying colors.  The battery was good.  That left the panels.  We decided to install switches under the aft locker next to the MPPT charge controllers to allow us to turn the panels off when we were running under engine power so as not to confuse the alternator and allow our starting battery to re-charge.

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It was a pretty simple job and (we hoped) would be a pretty easy fix to our crank problem.  The next couple of times she cranked fine, and we were sure to turn the panels off when we were under motor and turn them back on again once we killed the engine if we wanted solar input.  Life was good again.  Until …

Yes, again.  Such are the joys of owning a boat.  Seemingly randomly, after several times cranking without incident, the minute we had some family in town and invited them out on the boat for a beautiful, brisk day sail, she wouldn’t crank.  It was clear we

had a serious boat battery mystery to solve.  And,  I swear the boat thought it was funny.

It’s not funny, boat.

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Captain Sherlock and I were hot on the case.  It simply had to be “elementary.”

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