May 25, 2013 (yes, still!) – The Crossing Finale – Total Domestication

Once we got the “recycle” system in place, we could finally take a breath and kick back and enjoy the passage, intermittently at least.  The drip was pretty steady and Dasani bottles just aren’t that big,so they were filling pretty fast.  And I’ll tell you one thing duct tape adhesive does not like.  That’s heat.  The hotter it got down there near the engine, the gummier and gooier and less ‘adhesive’ our adhesive.  And, the more I kept sticking pieces in the same place, the less they stuck.  So, the catch-bin needed constant monitoring when the engine was running.  About every thirty minutes or so we had to cut the engine to let her cool, so I could pull out the Dasani bottle and check the level.

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Yep, she’s full!

Then pour the ‘caught’ fluid back in the transmission and pull the dipstick to make sure she was nice and coated.

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Yep, all pink!

Then tape a new, empty catch bottle back up and start the whole process again.  And, I guess because the engine just happened to be in the kitchen (well, under the sink) that job fell on me.  That’s right, Phillip had me right where he wanted me, cooking, cleaning and fluid-catching in the kitchen.

“Make sure you change the oil down there too, honey, before you start dinner.”

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“Yes, dear!”

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Yep.  Phillip had me all domesticated right and proper, handling all of my domestic obligations in the kitchen, including engine duty, like a real ladies maid.  Emily Post would be super proud!

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Screw Emily Post.  We all know what Annie really does in the kitchen …

drinks

That’s right, make sure the wet bar is fully stocked and throw a rum drink together, stat!  In all of my checking and changing and taping and sticking, I still found time to throw us together some hearty sea drinks.

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We have actually named this particular drink the Oh Shiiiiit! (yes, with five “i”s) in honor of Phillip’s knee-jerk, expletive reaction when he had his first sip.

For those 14 and over (at least that’s when I started) – mix as follows:

1.5 ounces Malibu Coconut rum

1 ounce dark Meyer’s rum

1 ounce pineapple juice

0.5 ounce orange juice

And a splash of Coco Lopez (optional – it makes it a little heavier but gives it that real island flavor)

Drink responsibly.

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Trust me, we did.  Only one (each).  Captain’s orders while on passage.  And, always with food (everyone needs a good soaker layer).  What do you think goes best with rum drinks??

Chips and salsa.  Of course!

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Complete with fancy salsa clip bowl, too, perfectly suited for a sloshing, sailing, salsa feast!

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And yet I still manage to miss my mouth.

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It’s a real talent.  But, you know, if you give a mouse a cookie, he’s going to want a glass of milk to go with it.  Turns out if you give a sailor some chips and salsa, he, too, is going to want a sammich to go with it.

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Yum!  Now save those Dasani bottles!”

The wind even started to pick up after lunch and we were finally able to kill the engine.  My God what a glorious feeling.  She sputters and rattles to a stop and then it’s just quiet.  So … quiet.  All you can hear is the wind whistling through the sails and the splash of the water on the hull as the boat moves through the Gulf.  We had a great sail that afternoon.  The wind was blowing around 12-15 mph, more south, southeast now, which helped ease us around Cape San Blas

Carrabelle to PC Revised

mostly on a broad reach.  (No, that’s not when a hooker goes for your wallet.  It’s an official sailing term, but I’ll save that little nugget for another day).

But, as the wind always does, she started to really blow (I told you she was a bitch!).  She picked up to about 18 to 20 as we sailed into the night.  The sea state was 3 to 4 foot waves, and the boat was cooking.  We were doing about 6.5 knots all night, with spurts of 7 and 7.5, particularly while I was holding the wheel.  I couldn’t imagine you could get tired holding the wheel of a sailboat, but it took some real muscle to hold our course.

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Thank goodness I’d been hitting the gym!  Ain’t that right, Sonnie??

We decided to reef the Jenny in (that is, roll her back up a bit so there’s not so much sail exposed to catch the wind) about half-way through the night.  In all, it was a bit of a rough sail, but nothing like the initial Crossing from Punta Gorda so we weathered it fine.  Phillip even fell asleep a couple of times, this time withOUT one eye open, but still right next to me in the cockpit.  I was thrilled to see him sleeping, finally, but pissed that he’d left the radio on the freaking Delilah show.  Don’t act like you don’t know who I’m talking about.  All you closet 94.1 fans.  That all-time lover of love.

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De-liiiiiiii-luuuuuhhh!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9v2-q_byiY

All.  Freaking.  Night.  Long.  Okay, for just like an hour and half, but it was the longest hour and a half of my life.  But, with Delilah in our corner and all her sappy love song dedications to keep us entertained, we made it through the night.  Having fought the wind all night, we were pretty beat the next morning.  While trucking on to Port St. Joe was an option, we decided to set our sights for Panama City and stay a night at the marina to get a good, not-so-Eagle-eye, night’s rest.  The wind turned right on our nose as we were coming into the pass so we had to do some motoring into Panama City, which meant more engine work for Annie.  But we pulled into the pass around 9:00 a.m. and got ready to dock her.

Now, I really was nervous this time.  This was only our fourth time docking our boat.  The first time was in Clearwater.  The wind was blowing around 25 mph off our stern then and I missed the stern pole but luckily we had two corn-fed hosses holding us off the dock.  The second time was in the Carrabelle River.  The water was glass and we had Mitch.  The third time I’m not sure you would really even call it a “docking,” per se.  That was when the engine cut out in the River and we had to throw out an anchor and throw the Catamaran guy a line and he walked us around to a dock.  That doesn’t really count.  This time was going to be a true ‘docking,’ and it was just Phillip and I.  No Mitch, no hosses, no corn (if that would help).  Let me just tell you, docking is super stressful.  Phillip has told me before, if you really want some entertainment, watch a couple try to anchor or dock.  There’s usually tons of shouting involved, finger-pointing, perhaps some dock or boat wreckage, all sorts of excitement.  That’s because it’s stressful!  One wrong move, one missed cleat and your boat, your beautiful, glossy, water-tight boat goes crashing into the dock or worse, the million dollar yacht next to it.  Not something you want to screw up.  I think this little gem pretty much sums it up:

Docking Flowsheet

Very informative.  But, there we were, our first time docking together.  Phillip had given me the best instruction he could.  “Watch the wind to see which way it’s pushing the boat and catch a cleat on the leeward side.”  Yes, that’s the best instruction Phillip could give.  He can sometimes be a little ‘stern’ when he’s barking orders from the stern.  But, he’s stressed.  I get it.  He’s driving the boat in.  He needs a first mate that just knows what to do, not one that requires hand-holding.  Thankfully he has that now, but I’m here to tell you he did not have that then.  I couldn’t tell for the life of me which way the wind was pushing the boat, if there even was wind, and I had no clue which side was leeward.  Leeward?  Really?  I had barely wrapped my heard around port and starboard at that point.

I was freaked.  Phillip had the wheel and I had about three lines tied to different cleats all over the damn boat, ready to tie her any which way.  Phillip started to pull her into the slip and I, ready as ever, Little Mate that Could, jumped off the boat prepared to tie anything.  Tie … anything.  TIE.  Damnit!  I had jumped off the boat without a line in hand.  Brilliant!  I stood on the dock knowing I had just royally screwed up.  Phillip shouted “Okay, now tie that bow line on the … ” but as the words came out of his mouth he looked up and saw my empty, useless hands, holding not a dock line, a beautiful, woven, boat-saving dock line, but rather, merely held up, empty, in the most apologetic of shrugs.  I guess Phillip needed to check the flowsheet to see what to do when:  Mate stands helpless as boat drifts off.

All I could see were the whites of Phillip’s eyes as I stood there helpless, useless, while the boat continued her steady, forward creep toward the dock.

May 25, 2013 – The Crossing Finale – Duct Tape and Dasani

There we were, with fluid dripping out of our brand new transmission like a leaky faucet and we were two hours from Carrabelle, two hours from Apalachicola, at least two hours from any port. It was like a geographical oddity.

Geo Oddity

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tw_YryVgLOg

We were two hours from anywhere!

And with only a half-quart of transmission fluid to go on. Having run her completely out of transmission fluid the last time, did we think to pick up more to have on board in case we needed to add more to the new transmission. Of course not! That would be way too effin smart. Nope, this was the same half-quart the infamous Mitch tried to hand us when we were topping off the fluids the morning she locked up in the Carrabelle River (You remember the Irony! http://havewindwilltravel.com/2013/07/29/april-29-2013-oh-the-irony/). I’ll bet his greasy fingerprints were still on it. I can just see Mitch now, leaned back, fingers steepled, his body racked with the bellowing “Muuuu-ha-haaaa” laugh of an evil villain.

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Okay, so I couldn’t find a picture of Mitch arched back in “villain mode.” Every picture I have of him he looks so sweet and blue-eyed. Mr. Innocent. But I know better. That Mitch is an evil, dynamite-laying, mustache-twirling villain. Deep down. A real Boris, that man.

Boris

And I just have to point out the “irony” of this Boris-comparison because Mitch’s real-life “Natasha” is not nearly as … vertically inclined.

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You see. Gorgeous? Yes! Tall? … not so much. But, we love Michelle. You’ll see more of her soon, I can assure you.

But, Mitch and “Natasha” and all other evil transmission villains aside, we had really found ourselves in a bit of a pickle. Every drop of fluid that splashed to the bilge put us one drop further from home, and we had a long way to go. Let me put things in perspective for you. Here’s the trip we had yet to make to get our boat from Carrabelle to Pensacola:

Last Leg Revised

Yeah, that’s right. Quite a ways to go. And, the first leg of the passage, from Carrabelle to Panama City:

Carrabelle to PC Revised

is about 90 nautical miles, roughly a 22 to 24-hour trip.

Then the last leg, from Panama City to Pensacola:

to pensacola Revised

is another 24 hours, easy. Like I said. Quite. A ways. To go. Hence, the pickle. The transmission drip was kind of a big dill. (Mmm-hmmmm … that’s right. Pickle jokes. Man I’m on fire today!)

Remember, we had very little wind that morning. It might have been blowing 3 mph. Maybe. But it was blowing out of the southwest, right on our nose, so it certainly wasn’t working with us. We weren’t going to get anywhere sailing even if I jumped up on the deck myself and blew into the sails.

And I’ve got a mighty set of lungs!!

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Chill folks … That’s just me blowing up a rockin’ marshmallow number for Halloween last year. You remember ole’ Stay Puft??

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Damn that was a great costume!

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Okay, back to the tranny. Fortunately we still had cell reception so we called Mechan-Eric to see if he had any brilliant ideas. UN-fortunately, he didn’t answer his phone and we had to leave a message. You can just imagine the agony of the next few minutes while we watched little tiny pink drops fall to an untimely death in the bilge, one after the other, while I constantly checked my phone.

Slide to unlock. Click. No messages.

Tick, tock.

Click. No messages.

Drip, drop.

Then. Finally! My phone shimmied and vibrated on the nav station, like a happy little bee. Such a glorious sound. I clawed and clamored and clicked that thing open faster than I ever have before. It was Eric calling back with what he said was “good news.” If you recall, the guy we bought the new transmission from had bought it brand new for his own project boat, that he, as many men often do, couldn’t seem to find the time for. So, the transmission sat on a shelf for over a year. Eric said he had seen that happen before, when a new engine component sits for a while the little rubber gaskets inside dry-rot and have to be replaced. Eric was sure that was it, just a simple little 97-cent gasket. An easy fix. “Just keep pouring more fluid in and you can replace the gasket when you get home,” he said. “Good news, right?”

Wrong Eric. Very wrong. As you know, we didn’t have that much “more” to pour in. (Cue the evil Mitch laugh again).

I explained our half-quart dilemma and Eric must have been on fire that day, too, because he did have a brilliant idea. Catch it. Capture it. Find a way to save those little pink drops of gold and pour them back into the transmission. Reduce, reuse, right? I nodded slowly and gave Eric the old “mmm-huh” as my inner gears started spinning. I relayed the news to Phillip, who responded with a blank, mind-boggling stare. “Do what??”

Thankfully, for Phillip, for the boat and for that damn transmission, I grew up country.

Me and Patches (2)

That’s right. Country. As a child, I “summered” on my Grandma (aka “Big Mom’s”) farm. In Alabama.

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With cows.

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And dogs.

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And a four-wheeler!

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Man, farming’s exhausting …

ZZZZ

But, if there’s one thing I learned on the farm, if you can’t get there in mud boots or fix it with duct tape, it’s probably not worth it.

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So, my country instincts kicked in.

“Phillip, I’m going to need that Dasani bottle.”

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“And some duct tape.”

I cut the top off of the Dasani bottle and flipped it over to make a funnel into the bottle and taped it on.

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Real high-quality engineering. Then I taped her up under the shifter arm of the transmission where the drip was coming from.

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The drip was coming from the base of this bolt here and would then fall into the Dasani funnel:

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The fluid would then pool in the bottle and voila!

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We’ve now successfully “captured” the transmission fluid and can pour it back into the transmission as needed. See? Nothing to it. Just takes a little country ingenuity is all. … And some duct tape.

With the ability to recycle the fluid, we were then able to keep on trucking across the Gulf. We set our sights on Panama City and never looked back.