May 25, 2013 – The Crossing Finale – Not Very PC

Like Phillip told me, apparently watching others dock is highly entertaining, particularly couples and particularly mouthy ones.  It’s now a favorite past-time for Phillip and I.  If Phillip and I are kicked back in the cockpit at the marina and we see some big troller coming in and hear the Captain shout “Now Linda, I need you to tie the springer line first this time!” (emphasis on first) our ears perk and we elbow each other and silently nod toward the troller because we know we’re about to get a show.

First off, trollers are huge.  They need lines running from every direction to hold them in place.

TieUp

Second, we know we’ve got a couple, a highly vocal Captain and a poor ‘Linda’ somewhere who’s scrambling for lines.  We also know this is not the first time they’ve docked together because apparently old Linda didn’t tie the right line first last time and the Captain was displeased.  He then shouted “And make sure to do a cleat hitch, remember!” (emphasis on MEM).  Poor, poor Linda.  A cleat hitch isn’t hard.  It’s just around a couple of times, some swoop loops on each end and pull tight (or that’s how I’ve programmed it into my mind anyway – real technical Annie speak for you), but here ‘tis:

cleat_hitch2

cleat_hitch

Sadly, though, it seems our dear friend Linda had been struggling with it.  Poor, poor Linda.  Phillip and I smiled slyly at each other.  Oh yeah, this scenario is fraught with potential.  We are definitely watching and standing ready to hop up and grab a line if Linda botches it.

It seems the good folks of Panama City felt the same about Phillip and I that day, and they, too, were definitely watching.  Thankfully, they were also ready and willing to lend a hand.  As the boat lurched into the slip, an old salt came running down the other side of the dock (apparently the side I should have jumped off on) and had Phillip throw him the stern line.  He told me to jump back on the boat and toss him the bow line, which I did.  I then jumped off, this time with a springer line in hand, and got us nice and secure.  Whew!  No crashed boat, no dock wreckage, and Phillip’s eyes finally returned to normal after an hour or so.  Well, technically after a drink or three.

Having played the role of Let-Down Linda for the day and justifiably displeasing the Captain, as soon as we were showered up and back on the boat, I promptly threw him together a stiff drink.  That always helps!

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Here you go Cap’n.

Dress

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Whew.  He smiles.  All better.  

And yes, people, I was wearing a dress.  You can see a little white fluffy sliver of it in the first pic.  I mean, I only jumped off the boat without a line – no damage was done – it warranted a remorseful drink only, not a full-frontal apology, okay?

After drinks on the boat, we set off and and started foraging for drinks on the street.

Downtown_Panama_City_FL

welcome-to-the-place

Downtown PC was quaint and lively with fun little quirky bars scattered about.  We decided on a place , that being The Place (http://www.theplacerestaurant.net/4543.html)and popped in for a swig.

the-place

The old-timey bar was great (and well-stocked!).  Our bellies full of fine liquor and our “spirits” high, we stumbled on back to the marina to stock up on transmission fluid and hunker down for the night.  Phillip played the domestic role this time and whipped us up an amazing batch of shrimp feta pasta.

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Don’t crowd the onions!

This dish has definitely become a favorite for us on the boat.  The ingredients are fresh and easy:

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Onion, parsley, garlic and shrimp.

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Oh, and butter of course.  That salty, yellow bounty of the gods.  Butter just makes everything better.    

Tossed with fresh tomatoes and pasta.  Super simple and easy to throw together at sea.  (Recipe here: http://havewindwilltravel.com/2013/06/04/april-17-23-2013-the-crossing-chapter-two-sailors-delight/).

And, as it always seems is the case at marinas, we had some front-row seating to some real entertainment while we were making dinner.  While we definitely prefer to anchor out as opposed to docking at a marina (for one, it’s cheaper – the nightly rate on the boat is … ummm … FREE) it is fun sometimes to stay at the marina and watch all the “crazies.”  They’re everywhere.  And, marinas seem to attract a very unique breed of them.  Drifters, so to speak.

While Phillip and I were putting the finishing touches on dinner and setting the table up in the cockpit, we noticed the guy next to us was working on a real project boat.  It was dusty and chalky with tools and buckets and hammers lying everywhere.  A real mess of a boat.  It looked something like this:

Project boat

And he was coated with dirt and paint splatters, sweating and sanding away on the deck.  Then, out of nowhere, we see this woman walking toward his boat.  Well, I take that back we heard her first, very distinct heel clicks coming all the way down the dock.  And, these were some serious heels, wedges I guess you would call them, about yay high:

High wedges

Yeah, the crazy kind, that crazy people wear.

Lady Gag in wedges

And when she finally came into view and we could take her in, she looked something like this:

Fox 1

Yeah … a real fox.  And, paint-splatter guy looked something like this:

Marina guy (2)

 I know, right?  This scenario was fraught with potential.  We were definitely watching.  Phillip and I slouched down a bit in our cockpit and eyed them furiously over the rims of our rum drinks.  Miss Fox walked right up to his boat, gave him a knowing nod and held her hand out for assistance.  Dirty Dude helped her into the cockpit, no words having been exchanged yet that we could tell, and she turned around and made her way backwards down the steps in the companionway.  Granted, I think that’s the only way you can take steps like that

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in heels like those.

Once she was down below, Dude put his hand in his pocket, pulled out something that I can only describe as “folding money,” fondled it for a minute, then shoved it back in his pocket and followed her down.  Phillip and I shared an excited “inquiring minds want to know” look and kept our eyes on them.  They stayed down for all of 3.5 minutes, give or take, and then she came back up solo (not a smudge of makeup out of place) stepped off his boat and clicked her heels right on down the dock.  Dirty Dude came back up about a minute after, big grin on his face, chugging down some Gatorade and then he set back to work on this boat, like nothing ever happened.  Phillip and I poured over the possibilities.  Was she a hooker, a prostitute?  His dealer, his daughter?  Who the heck knows.  Marinas are so entertaining.  Hell, sailors are entertaining.  This one, in particular, was not very PC.

Phillip and I could not stop chuckling about it as we plated up dinner.

Table for two please?

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This place was super fancy.  We had to make reservations well in advance.  I mean, it was dinner

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AND a foxy show.

We were ready for a relaxing evening after the passage from Carrabelle and we knew we needed a good night’s sleep before we made the last 24-hour run to Pensacola.  We settled into the cockpit, devoured the shrimp pasta and toasted the sunset before calling it a night.

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May 25, 2013 (yes, still!) – The Crossing Finale – Total Domestication

Once we got the “recycle” system in place, we could finally take a breath and kick back and enjoy the passage, intermittently at least.  The drip was pretty steady and Dasani bottles just aren’t that big,so they were filling pretty fast.  And I’ll tell you one thing duct tape adhesive does not like.  That’s heat.  The hotter it got down there near the engine, the gummier and gooier and less ‘adhesive’ our adhesive.  And, the more I kept sticking pieces in the same place, the less they stuck.  So, the catch-bin needed constant monitoring when the engine was running.  About every thirty minutes or so we had to cut the engine to let her cool, so I could pull out the Dasani bottle and check the level.

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Yep, she’s full!

Then pour the ‘caught’ fluid back in the transmission and pull the dipstick to make sure she was nice and coated.

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Yep, all pink!

Then tape a new, empty catch bottle back up and start the whole process again.  And, I guess because the engine just happened to be in the kitchen (well, under the sink) that job fell on me.  That’s right, Phillip had me right where he wanted me, cooking, cleaning and fluid-catching in the kitchen.

“Make sure you change the oil down there too, honey, before you start dinner.”

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“Yes, dear!”

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Yep.  Phillip had me all domesticated right and proper, handling all of my domestic obligations in the kitchen, including engine duty, like a real ladies maid.  Emily Post would be super proud!

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Screw Emily Post.  We all know what Annie really does in the kitchen …

drinks

That’s right, make sure the wet bar is fully stocked and throw a rum drink together, stat!  In all of my checking and changing and taping and sticking, I still found time to throw us together some hearty sea drinks.

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We have actually named this particular drink the Oh Shiiiiit! (yes, with five “i”s) in honor of Phillip’s knee-jerk, expletive reaction when he had his first sip.

For those 14 and over (at least that’s when I started) – mix as follows:

1.5 ounces Malibu Coconut rum

1 ounce dark Meyer’s rum

1 ounce pineapple juice

0.5 ounce orange juice

And a splash of Coco Lopez (optional – it makes it a little heavier but gives it that real island flavor)

Drink responsibly.

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Trust me, we did.  Only one (each).  Captain’s orders while on passage.  And, always with food (everyone needs a good soaker layer).  What do you think goes best with rum drinks??

Chips and salsa.  Of course!

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Complete with fancy salsa clip bowl, too, perfectly suited for a sloshing, sailing, salsa feast!

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And yet I still manage to miss my mouth.

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It’s a real talent.  But, you know, if you give a mouse a cookie, he’s going to want a glass of milk to go with it.  Turns out if you give a sailor some chips and salsa, he, too, is going to want a sammich to go with it.

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Yum!  Now save those Dasani bottles!”

The wind even started to pick up after lunch and we were finally able to kill the engine.  My God what a glorious feeling.  She sputters and rattles to a stop and then it’s just quiet.  So … quiet.  All you can hear is the wind whistling through the sails and the splash of the water on the hull as the boat moves through the Gulf.  We had a great sail that afternoon.  The wind was blowing around 12-15 mph, more south, southeast now, which helped ease us around Cape San Blas

Carrabelle to PC Revised

mostly on a broad reach.  (No, that’s not when a hooker goes for your wallet.  It’s an official sailing term, but I’ll save that little nugget for another day).

But, as the wind always does, she started to really blow (I told you she was a bitch!).  She picked up to about 18 to 20 as we sailed into the night.  The sea state was 3 to 4 foot waves, and the boat was cooking.  We were doing about 6.5 knots all night, with spurts of 7 and 7.5, particularly while I was holding the wheel.  I couldn’t imagine you could get tired holding the wheel of a sailboat, but it took some real muscle to hold our course.

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Thank goodness I’d been hitting the gym!  Ain’t that right, Sonnie??

We decided to reef the Jenny in (that is, roll her back up a bit so there’s not so much sail exposed to catch the wind) about half-way through the night.  In all, it was a bit of a rough sail, but nothing like the initial Crossing from Punta Gorda so we weathered it fine.  Phillip even fell asleep a couple of times, this time withOUT one eye open, but still right next to me in the cockpit.  I was thrilled to see him sleeping, finally, but pissed that he’d left the radio on the freaking Delilah show.  Don’t act like you don’t know who I’m talking about.  All you closet 94.1 fans.  That all-time lover of love.

Delilah_show

De-liiiiiiii-luuuuuhhh!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9v2-q_byiY

All.  Freaking.  Night.  Long.  Okay, for just like an hour and half, but it was the longest hour and a half of my life.  But, with Delilah in our corner and all her sappy love song dedications to keep us entertained, we made it through the night.  Having fought the wind all night, we were pretty beat the next morning.  While trucking on to Port St. Joe was an option, we decided to set our sights for Panama City and stay a night at the marina to get a good, not-so-Eagle-eye, night’s rest.  The wind turned right on our nose as we were coming into the pass so we had to do some motoring into Panama City, which meant more engine work for Annie.  But we pulled into the pass around 9:00 a.m. and got ready to dock her.

Now, I really was nervous this time.  This was only our fourth time docking our boat.  The first time was in Clearwater.  The wind was blowing around 25 mph off our stern then and I missed the stern pole but luckily we had two corn-fed hosses holding us off the dock.  The second time was in the Carrabelle River.  The water was glass and we had Mitch.  The third time I’m not sure you would really even call it a “docking,” per se.  That was when the engine cut out in the River and we had to throw out an anchor and throw the Catamaran guy a line and he walked us around to a dock.  That doesn’t really count.  This time was going to be a true ‘docking,’ and it was just Phillip and I.  No Mitch, no hosses, no corn (if that would help).  Let me just tell you, docking is super stressful.  Phillip has told me before, if you really want some entertainment, watch a couple try to anchor or dock.  There’s usually tons of shouting involved, finger-pointing, perhaps some dock or boat wreckage, all sorts of excitement.  That’s because it’s stressful!  One wrong move, one missed cleat and your boat, your beautiful, glossy, water-tight boat goes crashing into the dock or worse, the million dollar yacht next to it.  Not something you want to screw up.  I think this little gem pretty much sums it up:

Docking Flowsheet

Very informative.  But, there we were, our first time docking together.  Phillip had given me the best instruction he could.  “Watch the wind to see which way it’s pushing the boat and catch a cleat on the leeward side.”  Yes, that’s the best instruction Phillip could give.  He can sometimes be a little ‘stern’ when he’s barking orders from the stern.  But, he’s stressed.  I get it.  He’s driving the boat in.  He needs a first mate that just knows what to do, not one that requires hand-holding.  Thankfully he has that now, but I’m here to tell you he did not have that then.  I couldn’t tell for the life of me which way the wind was pushing the boat, if there even was wind, and I had no clue which side was leeward.  Leeward?  Really?  I had barely wrapped my heard around port and starboard at that point.

I was freaked.  Phillip had the wheel and I had about three lines tied to different cleats all over the damn boat, ready to tie her any which way.  Phillip started to pull her into the slip and I, ready as ever, Little Mate that Could, jumped off the boat prepared to tie anything.  Tie … anything.  TIE.  Damnit!  I had jumped off the boat without a line in hand.  Brilliant!  I stood on the dock knowing I had just royally screwed up.  Phillip shouted “Okay, now tie that bow line on the … ” but as the words came out of his mouth he looked up and saw my empty, useless hands, holding not a dock line, a beautiful, woven, boat-saving dock line, but rather, merely held up, empty, in the most apologetic of shrugs.  I guess Phillip needed to check the flowsheet to see what to do when:  Mate stands helpless as boat drifts off.

All I could see were the whites of Phillip’s eyes as I stood there helpless, useless, while the boat continued her steady, forward creep toward the dock.

May 25, 2013 – The Crossing Finale – Duct Tape and Dasani

There we were, with fluid dripping out of our brand new transmission like a leaky faucet and we were two hours from Carrabelle, two hours from Apalachicola, at least two hours from any port. It was like a geographical oddity.

Geo Oddity

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tw_YryVgLOg

We were two hours from anywhere!

And with only a half-quart of transmission fluid to go on. Having run her completely out of transmission fluid the last time, did we think to pick up more to have on board in case we needed to add more to the new transmission. Of course not! That would be way too effin smart. Nope, this was the same half-quart the infamous Mitch tried to hand us when we were topping off the fluids the morning she locked up in the Carrabelle River (You remember the Irony! http://havewindwilltravel.com/2013/07/29/april-29-2013-oh-the-irony/). I’ll bet his greasy fingerprints were still on it. I can just see Mitch now, leaned back, fingers steepled, his body racked with the bellowing “Muuuu-ha-haaaa” laugh of an evil villain.

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Okay, so I couldn’t find a picture of Mitch arched back in “villain mode.” Every picture I have of him he looks so sweet and blue-eyed. Mr. Innocent. But I know better. That Mitch is an evil, dynamite-laying, mustache-twirling villain. Deep down. A real Boris, that man.

Boris

And I just have to point out the “irony” of this Boris-comparison because Mitch’s real-life “Natasha” is not nearly as … vertically inclined.

boris

You see. Gorgeous? Yes! Tall? … not so much. But, we love Michelle. You’ll see more of her soon, I can assure you.

But, Mitch and “Natasha” and all other evil transmission villains aside, we had really found ourselves in a bit of a pickle. Every drop of fluid that splashed to the bilge put us one drop further from home, and we had a long way to go. Let me put things in perspective for you. Here’s the trip we had yet to make to get our boat from Carrabelle to Pensacola:

Last Leg Revised

Yeah, that’s right. Quite a ways to go. And, the first leg of the passage, from Carrabelle to Panama City:

Carrabelle to PC Revised

is about 90 nautical miles, roughly a 22 to 24-hour trip.

Then the last leg, from Panama City to Pensacola:

to pensacola Revised

is another 24 hours, easy. Like I said. Quite. A ways. To go. Hence, the pickle. The transmission drip was kind of a big dill. (Mmm-hmmmm … that’s right. Pickle jokes. Man I’m on fire today!)

Remember, we had very little wind that morning. It might have been blowing 3 mph. Maybe. But it was blowing out of the southwest, right on our nose, so it certainly wasn’t working with us. We weren’t going to get anywhere sailing even if I jumped up on the deck myself and blew into the sails.

And I’ve got a mighty set of lungs!!

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Chill folks … That’s just me blowing up a rockin’ marshmallow number for Halloween last year. You remember ole’ Stay Puft??

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Damn that was a great costume!

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Okay, back to the tranny. Fortunately we still had cell reception so we called Mechan-Eric to see if he had any brilliant ideas. UN-fortunately, he didn’t answer his phone and we had to leave a message. You can just imagine the agony of the next few minutes while we watched little tiny pink drops fall to an untimely death in the bilge, one after the other, while I constantly checked my phone.

Slide to unlock. Click. No messages.

Tick, tock.

Click. No messages.

Drip, drop.

Then. Finally! My phone shimmied and vibrated on the nav station, like a happy little bee. Such a glorious sound. I clawed and clamored and clicked that thing open faster than I ever have before. It was Eric calling back with what he said was “good news.” If you recall, the guy we bought the new transmission from had bought it brand new for his own project boat, that he, as many men often do, couldn’t seem to find the time for. So, the transmission sat on a shelf for over a year. Eric said he had seen that happen before, when a new engine component sits for a while the little rubber gaskets inside dry-rot and have to be replaced. Eric was sure that was it, just a simple little 97-cent gasket. An easy fix. “Just keep pouring more fluid in and you can replace the gasket when you get home,” he said. “Good news, right?”

Wrong Eric. Very wrong. As you know, we didn’t have that much “more” to pour in. (Cue the evil Mitch laugh again).

I explained our half-quart dilemma and Eric must have been on fire that day, too, because he did have a brilliant idea. Catch it. Capture it. Find a way to save those little pink drops of gold and pour them back into the transmission. Reduce, reuse, right? I nodded slowly and gave Eric the old “mmm-huh” as my inner gears started spinning. I relayed the news to Phillip, who responded with a blank, mind-boggling stare. “Do what??”

Thankfully, for Phillip, for the boat and for that damn transmission, I grew up country.

Me and Patches (2)

That’s right. Country. As a child, I “summered” on my Grandma (aka “Big Mom’s”) farm. In Alabama.

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With cows.

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And dogs.

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And a four-wheeler!

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Man, farming’s exhausting …

ZZZZ

But, if there’s one thing I learned on the farm, if you can’t get there in mud boots or fix it with duct tape, it’s probably not worth it.

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So, my country instincts kicked in.

“Phillip, I’m going to need that Dasani bottle.”

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“And some duct tape.”

I cut the top off of the Dasani bottle and flipped it over to make a funnel into the bottle and taped it on.

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Real high-quality engineering. Then I taped her up under the shifter arm of the transmission where the drip was coming from.

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The drip was coming from the base of this bolt here and would then fall into the Dasani funnel:

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The fluid would then pool in the bottle and voila!

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We’ve now successfully “captured” the transmission fluid and can pour it back into the transmission as needed. See? Nothing to it. Just takes a little country ingenuity is all. … And some duct tape.

With the ability to recycle the fluid, we were then able to keep on trucking across the Gulf. We set our sights on Panama City and never looked back.

May 24, 2013 – The Crossing Finale – A Trail of Tears

We woke Thursday morning to the sound of gerbils.  Angry, evil, little warbley gerbils.  (Yes, that’s a word.  If it in any way conveyed the throat-rattling, turkey gobbler-like sound they made, it did it’s job.  It’s a word).  You might think gerbils are these cute, cuddly little creatures, all soft and innocent, but I’m here to tell you they’re not.

Evil Gerbils

They’re loud, mangy, annoying little boogers that woke us up at 5:15 on Thursday morning.  Or, whatever it was sure sounded like gerbils, at least how I would imagine they would sound, if four of them were stuffed in a sock together, all wrestling and rabid.  For your benefit, I tried to capture the lovely sound that morning so you could truly understand.  Listen very closely:

http://youtu.be/1J0GBY2HB4A

And I would apologize for the language, but it was early and they were annoying and we are sailors, so …   I make no excuses. 

Okay, so you have probably figured out by now that they weren’t gerbils.  They were birds.  Angry birds.

Angry Birds

I’ve since learned this particularly noisy breed tends to inhabit lots of marinas and they like to wake you up at four in the friggin’ morning with their warbley, sock-wrestling mating calls.  Effin gerbils!

And, just as an interesting aside (so you get the benefit of all my hard blogging work), every time I Googled for images of gerbils, Richard Gere kept popping up.  Yes.  The actor.  Richard Gere.  I mean, every time!  There were even pictures of him with gerbils. 

richard-gere-2 

I know … creepy, right?  Which is why I decided to look into it.  And, you gotta love Google because I found this little gem.  Enjoy:

http://urbanlegends.about.com/od/celebrities/a/richard_gere.htm

Gere

Richard … you old dog, you!  And, to add icing on this glorious cake (and this will be my last mention of ole’ Richard, I swear), Phillip got a big kick out of the fact that I had never heard this “gerbil rumor” before and had to conduct an independent investigation.  I guess my age is showing.  As several of you reminded me after my last post, I am, in fact, younger than MTV (http://www.cnn.com/SHOWBIZ/Music/9807/31/encore.mtv/).

So, the angry birds did deny us a nice, leisurely rousing that morning, but it wasn’t too much of a sacrifice as, if you recall, we had planned to wake up early and get under way before sunrise.  Gerbils, or birds or angry roosters, we were ready to jump out of the v-berth regardless and get our beautiful boat a-goin’.

We checked the fluids: gas, oil, coolant and transmission fluid (of course!).  Like I said, we will never again, until our little sailing hearts stop beating, NOT check the transmission fluid before we crank the engine.  Whether it’s been a half hour or four days, we want to see that dipstick coated in sweet, pink nectar before we’ll even thinking about turning the engine over.  So, with the fluids in check, we readied the sails and tossed the lines and headed out into the Carabelle River.  We puttered along (knowing full well this time which side of the river to stay on http://havewindwilltravel.com/2013/07/08/april-17-23-2013-the-crossing-chapter-seven-right-of-the-river/) and made it out into the Gulf right at sunrise.  And it was like she rose just for us:

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Or it seems that is how sailing can make you feel sometimes.  Like the world is spinning just for you.

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And, this time it was just Phillip and I.  Me and the captain, off on our first couples cruise.  I was feeling like one incredibly lucky gal.  I mean, could life really get any better?

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Perhaps just a little, with a warm mug of heavenly hazelnut coffee I suppose, but just a little.

We brewed up some coffee and enjoyed the sunrise, and the sail, and the feeling of finally having her back out there in blue waters, headed home.  There wasn’t much wind, so we were motoring most of the morning, but I could have spent all day in that cockpit, holding the helm, or curled up with a book (or my laptop!) just watching the water float by.  I was perfectly content.  But, that’s why I’m only the first mate and Phillip is the captain.  Thankfully, he had the wherewithal to think to check on the engine.  I mean, she had been sitting for a month, she just had a new transmission put in, and we had been running her for about an hour and a half.

Phillip gave me the helm and went down below to see how things were looking under the “hood,” which in our boat, is akin to looking under the sink.  In order to access the engine on the Niagara, this “L-shaped” piece that houses the sink pulls back to give access to the engine, like a-so:

Sinker (2)

In place:

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Pulled back:

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And, the cool part is the sink hoses are all long enough and run in a manner that doesn’t require any unhooking, etc. to pull the sink back.  You just pull it back, lean it gently against the table (we put a pillow in between to cushion it), do your business under the “hood,” then tilt her back down gently in place, and the sink is none the wiser.  It’s really quite handy and, unlike many other boats which require removal of covers, plates, hatches, screws, etc. to get to the engine, this little “flip-top” contraption makes for very easy access when you’re underway.  I tell you all of this because it was a feature we were about to become incredibly familiar with and incredibly thankful for.

As I held the wheel, I could hear Phillip down below pull the sink back, set it against the table and click on a flashlight to take a look at the engine.  I saw his light moving in and around the engine and I could hear him wiggling some things and tinkering around.  I wouldn’t have thought much of it had his silence not continued for just a little too long.  Minutes passed and he he didn’t pop his head up and give me a thumbs up, or say “Everything looks great,” or “Good to go,” or anything like that.  He was just quiet.  Too quiet.  I wanted to ask him how everything was going, but I knew he’d tell me when it was time, and a part of me didn’t want to know.  I was perfectly content to sit up there at the wheel, watching the water dance by, pretending we didn’t even have an engine, or fluids, or any of that.

Engine?  What engine?  I’m just sailing along up here.  Doop-de-doo:

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But, Phillip finally raised his head in the companionway and gave me the exact look I was fearing.  Something was wrong.  He told me to put on the auto-pilot and summoned me down.  I came down the stairs, and he handed me the flashlight without saying a word, which worried me even more.  Although after the initial leg of The Crossing, I was certainly far more familiar with the engine than I was before, I was no diesel mechanic.  If the problem was obvious enough for me to SEE with my naked eye, it was probably bad.  And … it was.  Underneath the engine and slithering on down to the bilge was a bright, pink trail of fluid.

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leak (2)

Phillip and I were hoping it was just some of that famous Westerbeke Red paint Mechan-Eric had sprayed on the transmission to make it match the rest of the engine.

Paint

No, big deal.  Just some paint.  Surely that’s it.  But, as it always seems, life can never be that simple.  Having run the old transmission slap out of fluid the last time, we were all too familiar with that pink viscous liquid to be pretty darn sure what was trickling out of our engine was more likely than not transmission fluid.  Phillip showed me what he had found during his wiggling and tinkering,

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The leak:

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Leaking (2)

Little red drops kept forming, one after the other, under the shifter arm, and falling to a grey grave below in the bilge.  There was no denying it.  Our brand new, bright red, painfully expensive transmission was leaking.  We were two hours from Carrabelle, twelve hours from our next stop, with little wind and only a half quart of transmission fluid to get us anywhere.  I felt like I could have cried too, a little red trail of tears right down to the bilge.

May 23, 2013 – The Crossing Finale – Oysters and Beer

The day finally came.  May 23rd, and we were headed back to Apalachicola to finally bring our boat home.  We hitched a ride again with our sail groupies – you remember these guys – Phillip’s fabulous folks:

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We loaded up the truck again with all the tools, supplies and food (aka, the “provisions”) we would need to make another passage.

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I also had the pleasure of opening a few little gifts on the drive over as it seemed yours truly had a big “day” coming up.

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That’s right, I saw fit to grace this world with my presence during the early morning hours of May 28, 1982.

Me (2)

“Delivers only the best … ”   You’re damn right they do!

The gifts were great.  I certainly do enjoy birthdays.  I  couldn’t help but notice, though, they were all different versions of soaps, scrubbers and other self-cleaning products.  Perhaps Mary was trying to tell me something??  She’ll be glad to know I put them to good use on that trip.  For five minutes after each of the 1.5 showers I took during that 5-day passage, I was fresh as a daisy!

We stopped back in Apalachicola before making our way over to Carrabelle to check on the boat and spent a delightful afternoon walking around downtown, poking our heads in quaint little shops and, basically, just smelling the roses.

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We came across some neat old relics:

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Some creative artwork:

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And some fitting words of wisdom:

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That Ben Franklin sure was a smart guy.  Alcohol always makes me happy!

But, we had a lot to do to get the boat ready for the last leg of The Crossing, so it was off to Carrabelle to check on her and get her all packed up.

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How’s that cockpit looking Mary?  “It’s ready to go!”

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How about the crew Paul?  “I don’t want this one to go!”

As I look back through these photos, it seems Phillip did most of the “checking” while me and the groupies just engaged in a fun photo op.  Sorry Phillip!

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Yeah, that’s me, doing wildly inappropriate things behind Phillip.  Very mature … 

We did meet with Mechan-Eric to take a look at the transmission he had put in and saddle up, of course.  Funny thing how they want to get paid after doing work.  I mean …   Eric was great, though.  He had done a good job for us and had finished up the job just in time for us to sail her home.  He walked us through what all he had done and cranked the engine.  It was the first time we had heard her turn over in a month.  She grumbled and sputtered and started purring!  I don’t think I’ve ever heard a more glorious sound.  She was running!  Eric showed us the transmission, which he had painted a bright, cherry red to match the signature color of the engine, and shifted her through the gears (drive, neutral and reverse) so we could see the transmission at work.  Everything looked great.  We gave it the old Roger Ebert and we were ready to go!

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We decided to celebrate and polish the evening off with some oysters and beer (is there any better way?) at Eric’s family’s salty sea bar across the river – Fathoms.  And, I tell you, I’m not really an oyster fan.  I mean, they look like snot rockets in a shell, but I have to say, these were the best darn oysters I’ve ever slurped down.

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Not snotty at all!

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The oysters, that is.  These two here are pretty snotty!

We ate our fill and admired our boat across the river.

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Yep – that’s her!

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I swear I could see her little stern wagging.  Like a sad-eyed puppy at the pound that had finally been picked!  We were going to scoop her up and take her home with us!  First thing in the morning, too.  And, I do mean first thing.  Phillip and I were planning to get up and going before sunrise, so we needed some rest.  We bid our sail groupies adieu, enjoyed one last Carrabelle sunset in the cockpit and shut her down for the night.

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May 20, 2013 – Play Some Skynyrd!!

So, the last leg of The Crossing.  The final push.  The last mile.  The home stretch.  This was it.  After a month sitting stagnant in the lonely waters of the Carrabelle River, we finally got word our boat was ready to come home.  Mechan-Eric called on Monday to let us know he was expecting the transmission on Tuesday and would be installing it on Wednesday.  “That’s great,” we said.  “We’re coming Thursday.”  And so the feverish planning began.  Phillip and I had talked to some friends about helping us make the last leg of the passage back, but it seemed no one could get away for another 5-6 day trip … Except ME!!!  I felt like Gladys at the Senior Citizen’s Dance – just dying for Phillip to Pick me!  Pick me!

Pick-Me

I’d learned a lot on The Crossing and felt like I had really earned my stripes.  I was ready.  Put me in coach!  As true as that may have been, I had certainly proven myself sea-worthy on the first leg of The Crossing (or so Phillip told me while he gave me an “atta girl” pat on the head), the sad truth was I was the only one available.  I was his only hope, so I got the position by default:

Last kid picked

Fine by me.  That meant I was going!

So we started planning.  We decided to leave on a Thursday (May 23rd), via a ride from our ever-faithful sail groupies (aka Phillip’s folks), enjoy a final leisurely stroll with them through downtown Apalachicola on Thursday afternoon, crash on the boat that night and get up Friday morning to make the first passage to Panama City, about a 24-hour run.  We were going to decide then whether we wanted to stop in PC for the night or just keep trucking across the Gulf to Pensacola.

We started making another provisions list (you remember the beast of a list we put together for the initial Crossing: http://havewindwilltravel.com/2013/05/19/april-12-2013-purchase-and-pork-planning-and-provisions/), planning out our meals, checking our inventory of equipment.  Making lists and checking them twice, basically.  Since we were a little more comfortable with the boat (and figured with just the two of us, minus one mouthy second mate, it would be a bit quieter this time), we planned to bring a few more leisure items this time – books, the Kindle, the ukes, etc.

Wait.  Record scratch.  Errrhhht.  The whats?!?!  You heard me.  The ukes.  Ukeleles.

ukes

Little four-stringed guitar wannabe instruments that are great for the beach or the boat or just about anywhere your little uke-ing heart desires to play them.  You’ve heard them, I’m sure, in many Jack Johnson numbers, but I think Eddie Vedder really gave them that rock star sizzle.

Vedder

Oh, and there was also that Hawaiian guy with the rainbow song:

Iz

Whatever Iz name is.  Ha ha.  I kill myself some times.

Funny kid

My blog, my cheesy jokes.  I get to laugh if I want to.

Phillip actually got a uke first after several of his friends started bringing them to the beach to pick around on while waiting for the wind to blow.  Turns out, picking on a uke is much better than picking gnats and flies off each other while you’re sitting around waiting for the wind to blow.  Once he got one, I was destined.  We started out with some Mraz:

Yukes

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XoHw-hqiJHA&sns=em

Then graduated to some classic rock:

MT Uke

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dp-F7nWZGmw&sns=em

I mean, who doesn’t like Marshall Tucker Band?  Seriously?  I can tell you these classy folks right here do.

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We hit the town for some post-uke session drinks after the filming of that fine Marshall Tucker number.  We were the ones in the back of the bar, PBRs in hand, shouting “Play some Skynyrd!”

MT (2)

Yep, real classy.

Phillip and I are certainly not headed for a record deal anytime soon, but we don’t really care.  We just have a good time plucking and a-playing.

Besides my heart’s still set on Broadway.  I think my pal Lucy and I got a real shot!

Broadway Briefs 1

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=4992095483331

Ahh … the things I post on the internet for your sheer entertainment.  You can thank me later – or better yet, thank Lucy.  She rocked that number!

So, with the ukes and our musical ambitions on board, we set our sights on Apalachicola and getting our boat home.  Finally.  The big trip was just two days away and we were beyond excited!  I mean, could life get any better??

Fanta sea

April 17-23, 2013 – The Crossing: Final Chapter – Did He Say Curly Fries?

We all stood helpless, watching the boat inch closer and closer to the Catamaran.  I closed my eyes and gritted my teeth (the only thing I knew to do at the moment) while my mind conjured horrific images of boat crashes:

Boat crash

Boat crash 2

Boat crash 3

Okay, not deadly, fatal crashes, but pricey ones all the same.  I was sure the boat was going to come out of it looking something like this:

Boat damage

If not worse:

After crash

But, just as I was bracing for the worst, I felt a tug on the anchor line.  It had caught.  Finally.  I gripped hard and shouted to Phillip.  We didn’t want to yank it up so he said it was best to let some line out and let it dig in a bit.  A dicey proposition when your boat is headed straight for one three times the price, but it wouldn’t help anything if the anchor slipped.  I let some more line inch through my hands as the boat slowed.  Finally.  We eased up to the Catamaran with just enough room for the guy to push us off of his glistening gem.  We handed him a line and he helped us walk our boat over to an empty spot at the dock and tie up.  The relief of having the boat stopped and secured made us forget momentarily about the engine.  At least she was tied up and not going anywhere.  (Ted Bundy would be so proud!).

The Catamaran guy was a big help, though, and quite understanding.  Turns out he had also had a boat that was broke down on the other side of the river.  It seems engine problems are common in the boating community.

Row

Boat humor with a legal spin … man I’m on fire today!

We joked that there must be something in the water, but that was actually a legitimate concern.  We checked the fuel pump to see if it was clogged and preventing fuel intake or wasn’t separating the water from the fuel, but it seemed fine.  We checked the impeller (where the boat pulls in sea water as a coolant for the engine) to make sure it wasn’t clogged, which could have caused the engine to overheat.  But, no dice there either.  We simply had no answers.  We had checked and filled the oil that morning, checked the coolant, gassed up, and she had cranked fine.  She was running fine, up until the moment she wasn’t.  We felt like the guys on King of the Hill, just standing around scratching, and drinking, and wiggling a wire here and there, with no real progress.

KOH

A lawn mower focus group if you will.

We tried to crank her a couple more times at the dock but she wouldn’t even turn over.  It was almost like she had a dead battery, but we knew that wasn’t the case because the house batteries were full and running fine.  We were at a loss.

So, Phillip had me get on the phone and try to find a mechanic that could come out and take a look at the engine.  The bad news was most of them were located in Apalachicola – a good 30 minutes away – without the resources or time to make a special, emergency trip to the Carrabelle River to check us out.  But, thankfully, after a handful of calls and some groveling and pleading, we were lucky enough to find a willing victim.  Turns out he worked out of a marina just around the bend in the river from where we had docked, which he had been operating out of for over twenty years, and his family owned a local restaurant on the Carrabelle River.   In those parts, he was the diesel engine guy.

Coincidence?  I think not!

Bailey

The mechanic’s name wasn’t Bailey, though, it was Eric.  And he looked nothing like Will Ferrell, in case you were wondering.  He had a big job on a barge to get to that day so he told us he’d stop by on his way out to see if our problem could be fixed quickly and he could get us back on our way that day.  Eric arrived within the hour, and he was super sharp.  He immediately began tinkering and turning bolts and troubleshooting and crossing items off of his differential diagnosis.  We were glad to see him roll up his sleeves and go to work so quickly, but not pleased with the fact that he, like us, kept coming up empty-handed.  We continued our super-helpful practice of standing there, watching, scratching … and drinking, but apparently it wasn’t enough.  Eric came up greasy, sweaty and shaking his head in defeat.  He was going to have to take the engine apart to figure it out, but he had to get out to that barge.  He said he would send his guys back out in a couple of hours to get to work on it.

Unfortunately, we were approaching high noon, a very hot high noon, and we were tired and drained and just … weary from the passage.   Phillip and I sat on the dock, baking in the heat, frustrated with the situation, waiting for the engine boys to come back, both of us thinking of any place we’d rather be than stranded there on a hot dock with a broke-down boat.

Perhaps lounging in soft hammocks on the beach:

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Enjoying cocktails at sunset:

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Or back at the helm of that beautiful boat, a gentle breeze blowing over us:

Dub and I 2

Anywhere but there.  But we had a tough decision to make.  It was already noon, on Tuesday, and we had at least another 48 hour passage ahead of us, assuming the engine could be fixed on the spot.  The possibility of even making it back to Pensacola by the end of the week looked grim.  We talked it through and decided we had to call it.  We were going to have to leave the boat at the marina in Carrabelle and make the four-hour drive home by car.  We were truly disheartened.  Phillip and I wanted to make this passage, to bring our boat back to its home-port, once and for all.  Make the dream a reality.  But we just didn’t have the time to spare, especially with the status of the engine currently a complete unknown, and any solution hours, days, maybe even weeks away.  We hated the thought of leaving her there, alone, miles away from home, without any answers, and we hated the thought of coming back to Pensacola in some crappy rental car, when we were supposed to sail in on crystal green waters, in our shiny new boat.  Phillip and I sat somberly on the dock, one apologetic hand on the boat.

Unfortunately Mitch, however, wasn’t sharing in our mood.  He bounded up to us like Tigger at the circus, all giddy and goofy, and said, “You know this restaurant here opens at noon.  Do you think they’ll have curly fries?  I could really go for some curly fries.”

Phillip and I exchanged a pointed look: Did he really just say curly fries?

I swear, if we didn’t get that rental car soon, I was going to shoot him.

Russell 002_3

April 17-23, 2013 – The Crossing: Chapter Seven – Right of the River

We didn’t reach the mouth of Carrabelle River until around 9:00 p.m. on Monday night.  It had been a very long day (and an even longer night).  Nerves were worn and it was clear we were trying not to snap at each other but anything that had previously come across as an easy request or friendly suggestion (“Hey Mitch, can you had me that line?”) now seemed like a personal attack and was responded to in kind (“I was just about to give it to you” with a snare).  We were just exhausted.  We’d been at sea for about 36 hours, and the dinghy incident had really drained us.  And, we were hungry.  Which didn’t help matters.  All we wanted to do was dock, shower, eat and rest.  In that order.

We were able to find the entrance to the river on the Garmin, despite the sad excuses for markers.  I mean, it’s usually pretty easy to see the red and green blinking lights at night, they look like Christmas trees on the horizon, but these must have been the Charlie Brown version.

CB Tree

They were blinking once every four seconds, at best, and were barely eeking out enough light that it you squinted and turned your head to the left, you could just make them out.  We were like George Costanza without his glasses – spotting those dimes!

George

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gxLzoK2-Rc

But, spot them we did and began making our way into the river.  Phillip asked me to find a marina on the river, whatever was closest that had fuel, water and pump-out, get directions in, and get us a transient slip for the night.  Sounds like a tall order, and for me, it was.  That’s a lot to ask of a blonde (I mean, directions?  Are you kidding?).  But, remember what I said about the personal attacks.  Phillip was in no kind of mood for questions.  I just started Googling and hoped for the best.  I got another Harry-Dick-Lou character on the phone.  He was with The Moorings marina on Carrabelle River.  And, I swear to you, these are the exact directions he gave me:

“Just stay ‘right of the river’ till you get around the bend, then you’ll see our fuel sign.”

Now remember who I’m dealing with – your average, everday dockmaster:

Lou

I asked several times for clarification (knowing this probably wasn’t going to suffice Phillip), but that’s all he would give me: “Just stay right of the river and you won’t have any problem.”  Right of the river.  I have to admit I was a bit confused.  I was sure he meant stay on the right side of the river.  Surely that’s what “right of” meant.  But, I’d never quite heard it put that way (and mind you, I know a good bit of ‘country’ directional terms: up yonder, down yonder, past the ditch, up a ways, etc.)  But, I guess I’ve never been introduced to nautical country, and I was clearly struggling.  I came up to the cockpit and relayed the directions to Phillip, watching his face closely for what I was sure was going to be disapproval.  His shoulders dropped and he looked me dead on and asked, “Right of the river?”  He had the same reaction as I did.  What exactly did that mean?  Well, I tell you, we were about to learn.

We started into the river, trying to stay on the right side as much as possible, but Carrabelle River is about 100 yards across in some places, pretty narrow for a sailboat.  The left bank was marshy and overgrown, and the right bank was littered with docks and piers and homemade sea walls.  There were also plenty of boats docked up on the right side, jutting out and forcing us more toward the “middle” of the river, than the “right.”  It was also hard to see in the river at night.  There were just a few little pier lights and street lights casting a light glow on the water.  We found a great spotlight on the boat only to find the DC inlet it plugged into wasn’t working.  So, we relied solely on the ‘Costanza squint’ and kept checking the depth gage every few seconds.  Mitch saw some other sailboats anchored up ahead on the left side of the river, which gave us some comfort, but apparently too much.  Mitch was pointing and we were all looking ahead, trying to make them out, when the boat came to an immediate, gut-halting stop.  We all lurched forward as a thick, muddy sound erupted from the river.

We had run aground.

I couldn’t believe it.  I had spent hours (yes, hours, probably – all told) watching that depth gage and calling out readings to Phillip.  I knew it was a concern.  I knew it was a possibility, but it’s like I didn’t believe it could actually happen.  Surely the boat doesn’t go that deep …

Apparently it does.  I thought that was it, we were through, that was the absolute worst thing that could happen.  Images of the boat looking like this the next morning flashed through my mind:

Run aground

But, thankfully, it seems if you’re going to run aground, the best place to do it is in thick, soft river mud.  Phillip threw her in reverse and she lurched out, with a loud, muddy smack.  We all let out a monstrous sigh of relief and started looking around, apparently with new clarity, because it wasn’t until then that we noticed, right in front of our faces, was a string of red day markers (no lights), forming a line beyond the middle of the river, showing us how far out the shoal came, leaving only a narrow channel between the markers and the docks on the right side that was deep enough to travel.  Lou really meant right of the friggin’ river.  Phillip rolled his eyes and shook his head, but kept on.

We made it to the marina and, this time, docked with ease.  The river was protected from winds and we were a bit more experienced at bringing her in.  We got her tied up and buttoned down and hit the showers.  If I had to describe them, I would call them … semi-functional truck-stop showers.

Prison shower

Although some ‘stalls’ had flimsy, torn curtains, most had none at all, so they were pretty much like gym-class community showers, but at least I didn’t have as much to worry about as the boys.

Soap

Truth is, though, we were exhausted and smelly and dirty and salty.  Any rusty spicket that dribbled luke-warm water on us would have easily been deemed the best shower we’d ever had.  It’s funny how uncomfortable conditions can make you truly appreciate the smallest amenities of your everyday life.  A hot shower … it was like a Christmas miracle.

I was second back to the boat.  I climbed on board, every muscle and joint aching, deep, purple bruises forming on every bony prominence and just thoroughly exhausted, and I find Mitch stretched out on the settee.  I mean laid out, the full length, arms behind his head, ankles crossed, totally kicked back and he asks me, “So … are you going to make that sausage for dinner?”  It was a record-scratch moment.  Time stopped, at least for a second.  I wish I could have seen my face when he asked me that.  Because if this is what Mitch was thinking:

Respect

Here’s what I was thinking:

high five

I didn’t even know what to say.  Thankfully Phillip walked in and I didn’t have to (because I don’t think Mitch would have wanted to hear it).  I turned my back to Mitch, looked at Phillip and told him I was going to go check the dock lines while he got the sausage started for Mitch for dinner.  I bit my lip and threw up an eyebrow as I passed him on the way out.  I don’t know what conversation ensued while I went topside to emit some hot fumes but when I came back down Mitch was setting the table and pouring me a glass of wine and we all made dinner together and never mentioned it.  There wasn’t any need.  We were all tired, we were all hungry and I’m sure it was just his caveman instinct kicking in.  “I am man.  Feed me.”

Caveman

Except this guy is way better looking than Mitch.  Ooohhh … burrrnnn.  Okay, now I feel better.  (We’re even Mitch).

We inhaled our food, eyelids drooping and heads bobbing, and went straight to bed.  I don’t think I’ve slept that hard since my last college bender.  (Okay, my last bender – we all know it was well after college).  We woke up a little disoriented and groggy, each blinking and looking at each other suspiciously wandering where exactly we were and why we felt like we’d been run over by a Mac truck.  But, we rallied quickly, cracked some jokes about community showers and started readying the boat for the last leg of the passage.  It was Tuesday morning.  We were about a day and a half behind schedule, but we had crossed the Gulf.  Our plan was to cruise along the coast to Panama City for a quick stop, overnight if necessary, before making the last leg of the trip into Pensacola Pass late Wednesday evening.  We all moved with a little more spring in our step as we fueled up, pumped out and filled the water tanks.  Phillip checked and filled the oil and we cranked her up and started back down the river.

I went down below to start some coffee and breakfast for the boys, making some light joke about sausage.  But, just as I started to fill the kettle, a deafening blare filled the galley.  It was the sound the engine makes when you turn the key just before starting it, and it was a somewhat familiar sound (in that I heard it often during the trip) but it was usually one sound in a series of several familiar sounds that ended with the cranking of the engine: click, beep, rumble, crank.  This was just the beep.  A shrill, lonesome, ear-piercing beep.  Then it dawned on me (I know, I’m brilliant, try to keep up) that the engine wasn’t running.  That’s why the beep seemed so loud and persistent.  I heard footsteps pound overhead on the deck and Phillip shouted “Mitch, go get the … ” something.  I couldn’t make it out, but the tone in Phillip’s voice was urgent.  I climbed the stairs to the cockpit and saw Phillip looking frantically about, his hands on the key and ignition.  Mitch shouted back to him, “Did you try to re-crank it?”  Phillip looked at me and rolled his eyes.  It was a legitimate question, but I mean, really??  Nope, I’m just sitting back here watching the wind blow.  I could tell by now that we were having engine trouble, but I have to admit, as a sailing newbie that didn’t worry me immediately.  So, the engine won’t crank.  What’s the big deal?  I know what you’re thinking.  Remember, you heard it from me, first.  I’m brilliant.

Then I looked out and the gravity of the situation set in.  We were floating helplessly along the river.  The narrow, shallow, expensive-boat-lined river.  And, without the engine, we had no way to stop ourselves from crashing into any one of these options – the bank, the bottom, the half-a-million-dollar Catamaran that we were drifting effortlessly toward.  It then dawned on me why Mitch had run up to the bow.  He was trying to drop the anchor to stop us.

And, I know you boating enthusiasts and avid sailors are getting a big hearty laugh right now at my ignorance.  Go ahead, laugh it up, seriously.  Looking back on it now, I do too:

Opie

Golly jeepers Cap’n.  The engine won’t crank?  Are we in a pickle?

I was an idiot.  I know this.

Phillip scrambled in the cockpit and asked me to help him get the other anchor out of the lazarette.  We were both grabbing and throwing lines, jamming our hands in as fast as we could to get everything out because of course (of course!) the anchor was on the very bottom.  I tore a huge chunk out of my knuckle in the process that I only discovered later by following the blood trail back to the lazarette.  We finally got the anchor out and chunked it overboard.  We fed out line frantically, hoping she would catch.  We looked up to see where we were drifting and the owner of the half-a-million-dollar Catamaran, who, before, had just been gingerly polishing his boat, wiping away any small, unwanted spots and specks, was now watching a 35-foot, 15,000 pound unstoppable sailboat head straight for it.  I gripped the line to the anchor and watched as the Catamaran guy stood up and stretched his neck tall like a crane, his hose now hanging aimlessly, splashing water loudly on his deck, and his eyes opening wide as we inched closer.  There was nothing we could do.  We were going to hit him.

April 17-23, 2013 – The Crossing: Chapter Six – Never Trust a Non-Drowsy Drug

After the dinghy incident, Mitch’s “non-drowsy” Dramamine kicked in again and we lost him to the settee (the boat’s version of the couch) for another 8 hours.  Phillip and I stayed up at the helm through the night, enjoying the now smooth feeling of the boat heeling left to right and the pleasant swish of the hull rolling back and forth in the water.  Don’t get me wrong, it was still spitting rain and we were chilled and soaked, clinging to the helm like a wet cat on the edge of the tub.  But, without the screeching and banging of the dinghy on the back, what was once about as pleasant as the dragging of hooks across sheet metal now felt like a summer afternoon on a sun-drenched porch swing.  I curled up next to Phillip at the helm, laid my head on his back, closed my eyes and let the movement and sounds of the boat engulf me.  Although serene, the night was a bit eerie in the sense that we could not, had not, seen the horizon since sunset and there was not a sign of any other vessel that night, no other ship, boat, plane, train or automobile anywhere to be seen.  We were still in the middle of the Gulf, completely alone, with stinging rain and cold winds.  But, we bundled up and hunkered down at the helm.

The boat performed beautifully that night.  The waves were still 4-6 feet, but she climbed them effortlessly and without complaint.  It was as if the dinghy was the one bloody thorn in her heel and now that we had pulled it out and rubbed the wound, she embraced us with gratitude and carried us through the storm.  Phillip, too, was a rock that night, holding the helm for about 8 hours, without complaint, despite the steady heeling and rough waves.

IMG_1393

Once the sun came up on Monday, and we could finally see the horizon and the waves and assess our state of affairs in the daylight, my survival instincts sauntered to the background and my initial, adventurous tendencies returned.  I whipped out the camera to begin, once again, documenting our tale.  While trying to capture Phillip in photo at the helm, I inadvertently took a short video clip.  Funny thing is, I scolded my phone at the time for going rogue but clearly she had the right idea as I wish I had recorded another 10 seconds to give you a real feeling of the waves we had been scaling for the last 24 hours.  But, alas, as it always rings true, my “smart phone” is, indeed, smarter than I.  I give you the clip regardless:

http://youtu.be/SDeP9-LlZIc

I fear, much like a third of a gopher, that video would only arouse your appetite without bedding her back down.

gofer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qw6Hon013E  (Complete with spanish subtitles for your viewing pleasure).

No, no.  Only a whole gopher village will do for my faithful followers.  Here you’ll find some much more fulfilling footage of the friendly, finned ambassadors that welcomed us that morning into the Pass at Apalachicola.

http://youtu.be/wYOXuOrBMkk

Dolphin

We’d been out to sea for approximately 27 hours (Phillip and I having spent about 24 of those in the cockpit or at the helm).  A slightly-less ghastly Mitch finally woke to the light of day and joined us in the cockpit.

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We finally made it into the Pass around noon and spotted land.  The shelter from the shore also gave us some relief from the wind which, for the first time since we had left Clearwater, was finally pushing us along toward our destination as opposed to beating us broadside and making us fight for every nautical inch.  But, most importantly, we were finally on the “other” side of the Gulf.  We had done it, crossed it, conquered it, put it behind us and we all collectively breathed a sigh of relief having simply achieved it.  Being in the Pass, in the sunlight and comfort of familiar shores, definitely put the crew and captain in good spirits.

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We were eager to get to Apalachicola, get the boat secure and get ourselves to a hot shower.  We finally regained cell signal and called the Bottom Line guys to check in.  Although we learned later we had not actually lost radio contact the night before.  The main unit below simply wasn’t working because the handheld had gone out.  Once we disconnected the handheld, the main unit worked fine.  But, that was certainly not the understanding the night before and, regardless, that revelation came a bit too late because it turns out the Bottom Line crew had been trying to hale us on the radio throughout the night and, after hours of no contact, had reported to the Coast Guard that they had lost contact with us.  They were just getting into Apalachicola (about 3 hours ahead of us) and were glad to hear we were safe.  We contacted the Coast Guard to let them know we had made it safely, albeit minus one dinghy.  Looking back, that was a small price to pay.

We expected to get into Apalachicola around 3:00 p.m. and we motored along the Pass, enjoying the sights of land, other boats, a bridge, all the soothing signs of civilization around us.  The Bottom Line guys had told us the bridge into Apalachicola was 65 feet, so we wouldn’t have any trouble getting under.  One little lesson about sailing (a very obvious, but easily overlooked one – or at least I over-looked it) is that you can’t go under a bridge that’s too short for your mast.  The mast on Plaintiff’s Rest’s is 50 feet, which is definitely on the high end of the spectrum and something we considered at length when we were thinking seriously about buying her.  But, you learn, over time, that every option and feature on a boat is a trade-off.  While a Sloop Rig, like ours, with a taller mast means less sails to deal with:

Sloop Rig

shorter masts (usually two – like on a Ketch Rig pictured here) means more sails to wrestle and wrangle:

Ketch Rig

I stand behind my original analogy in that finding the right sailboat is like finding the right mate.  Any sailboat is never going to be absolutely, 100% perfect.  There’s always going to be things about her that you have to work around or deal with, it’s just a matter of deciding which “flaws” you can live with and which ones you cannot.  Our mast height is one we decided we were willing to live with.  But, “living with it” means we have to check and double-check each time we come to a bridge.  So, Phillip got the guy at the marina in Apalachicola (another Lou, Bob, Dick, Harry type) and asked about the bridge height.  He told us he thought the bridge was 50 feet but that he wasn’t certainThanks man, real helpful.

This troubled Phillip to no end.  And, for good reason, because I’ll tell you, the time to learn your mast is too tall for a bridge is not right when you come up on it.

Too tall

As much as we may curse our mast on occasion, we never want to see her laying down on the deck like this:

Mast down

So, Phillip pulled out the paper charts Jack had left on the boat to check the bridge height.  Sure enough, the chart said it was 50 feet, which meant this Plaintiff was not going to be Resting anytime soon, and particularly not in Apalachicola.  We began looking for another marina where we could come in to dock for the night and we found we had passed the inlet for Carrabelle River about eight miles back.  (Funny, I’ll bet you’re thinking, like I used to – eight miles, that’s nothing, whip around!).  Let me drop some knowledge on you.  Our optimal speed in the boat is about 4-5 miles/hour.  So, “eight miles back” translated to another two or so hours backtracking in the Pass (against the wind) and then another two to three hours to get into the river and get docked and it was 2:00 p.m. already.  But, considering the dilemma with the bridge, it was the only option.  The crew was a bit disheartened as we turned around and started steering away from Apalachicola.  It was just there on the horizon, within reach it seemed, but we were now turned, steering away, putting more distance between the boat and land.  Mitch and I stared back like two kids leaving Disneyland.  Thankfully, though, the weather had died down at last, Mitch had regained color and we were moving along smoothly.  We looked forward to getting to Carrabelle.  Little did we know what was waiting for us in the River.

April 17-23, 2013 – The Crossing: Chapter Five – A Harrowing Debacle

Some of you have already heard this story and know where things are going.  If you fall into this category, I hope you’ll keep reading with vigor, in search of any extra details I may have missed when I told it in person, which I’m sure was over big, hearty drinks and involved grand arm gestures and finely-crafted impersonations.  If you do not fall into this category, I’m glad.  That means you’re a virgin to my tale, which is no tale at all, and will be soaking it in for the first time.  And, it will allow me to engage you in an old fashioned game of Can You Spot the Difference:

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Okay, so there are many differences.  Thankfully, in the latter photo, I managed to clean up and change my outfit (I do that on occasion).  Although I am sitting all side-saddle and lady-like in the first photo, clearly, I’ve forgone that option and just plopped down full-frontal and tacky-like in the latter.  In one photo I’m wearing gloves and the other I’m not.  Okay, I’ll give you that as well.  There’s also a coffee mug in the cup holder and a visor on the gear shifter (good eye my nerdy friends!).  Sure, those are all well and good.  But, what is the main difference?  Look hard

That’s right, the dinghy.  And, the flag, true, but that’s attached to the davits (the steel arms) that hold the dinghy on the back of the boat.  The difference is the dinghy.  The damn dinghy.  The source of our harrowing debacle.  And I credit this title to a good friend of mine who, when I first told her this fine tale, which I lovingly called “the most exciting adventure of my life” (primarily because I survived it), claimed it sounded more like a ‘harrowing debacle’ than an adventure.  Thanks Dottie.  But, debacle or adventure, it happened.  And, we all, thankfully, lived to tell the tale.

So, we set out Sunday morning on a beautiful morning sail, headed to Apalachicola.  The sun was out, the wind was blowing and the boat was performing beautifully.  We felt like we had taken measures to ready the boat for the storm we knew we were going to face, and we were ready to get the passage behind us.  We started to see squalls on the horizon around 2:00 p.m.  The waves were 2-3 at the time and we furled the Genny and reefed the main sail (pulled it down so only about half the sail was exposed to catch the wind).  The Bottom Line guys had put some distance between us earlier in the day, and we could no longer see them on the horizon, but we knew we could hail them on the radio at anytime if we needed to check in.  We were just motoring along, holding our heading, bracing for the storm.  The wind picked up in the afternoon to 20 knots, and we dropped the main sail entirely and latched her down.  The sea state increased to 3-4, and the waves were hitting us broadside on starboard (the right side of the boat).  And by that, I mean there was no way to turn into the waves to cut into them and ease the impact on the boat.

Wave diagram

Much like the red boat in this picture, but we were almost directly parallel to the waves.

We were headed northwest and the winds were coming at us northeast.  There was nothing we could do but let the boat heel to and fro over them.

Heeled over

Graphic – boat heeled to starboard.

 Heeled 1

Visual – boat heeled to port.

And heel she did.  Probably 50-60 degrees in each direction.  Back and forth.  For hours.  I snapped a few shots trying to capture it, but the pictures just don’t do it justice.  You have to really experience it to appreciate the sensation.

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Notice Phillip’s foot propped up on the portside of the cockpit, bracing himself.  And, do also notice the Gorton’s Fisherman pants he’s wearing.

The rain started late afternoon and spat at us all evening and into the night.  With the rain and waves splashing over the starboard deck, we were all getting soaked in the cockpit.  So, we scoured the boat that afternoon hoping Jack had left some good wet weather gear behind, and boy did he!  We struck gold with a complete Gorton’s fisherman outfit – big yellow hat and all.

 Gorton's

We each swapped and shared each piece of that yellow rubber suit – jacket, pants, hat and boot.  When it came time to hold the helm, you could hear each of us holler at one of the other “Where’d you put the Gorton’s hat?”  “I need the Gorton’s pants!”  And, I think I heard at one point, “God, I love Gorton!”  We certainly appreciated that dry, rubbery goodness.  That stuff is for real.

The waves kept coming and the rain stayed on us all afternoon. We were pruny and drenched and squinting out onto the horizon, only to see clouds, darkness and swells.  We tried to hale the Bottom Line boys on the radio at one point to see how they were faring, only to find our radio had gone out.  (We later learned only the handheld in the cockpit had shorted, due to the heavy drenching, and our main unit down below still worked once the hand-held was disconnected – but we certainly did not know that at the time).  We were 150 miles offshore, in 4-6 foot seas with no radio.  But our engine powered through and we pushed on, heeling left and right for hours.  You could often look down and see the water was just inches away from the deck.

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At first, it was hard for me to believe every time the boat kicked over that it was, in fact, going to right itself.  But, it did.  It does.  Every time.  The boat always comes back up.  And, after enough heeling and righting, you start to develop limitless trust in the boat.  No matter how far she heels over, you never believe for one second that she will actually tip.  Not ever.  Like she’s a Weeble or something.

Weebles

Unfortunately, after several hours of weebling and wobbling, Mitch started to get a little green around the gills.  He kept fumbling around for something in his bag and couldn’t find it.  Remember what I told you about him going up and down the companionway stairs?  He looked like a grown man romping around the Play Place at McDonald’s.  So it was incredibly obvious when he kept going down below to “find something” only to come up empty-handed.  He finally faced the music and admitted to us that he was looking for his Dramamine (as if we didn’t notice he had lost all the color in his face and his head had been hanging low on his shoulders for hours).  You can tell from his solemn expression in this photo; he was irretrievably seasick:

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We finally found his Dramamine tucked away behind some hidden zipper in his bag, and he dosed up.  I noticed at the time the package said “non-drowsy,” but I’m here to tell you that was the not the effect it had on Mitch.  But I’m getting ahead of myself.  Mitch tossed his cookies just a few times.  To his credit, he found himself a bucket and kept it nearby, trying to be a gentleman about it, but I kept coming across that dad-burn thing on the table, or the kitchen counter, splashing around and reeking with vomit.  I wanted to tie it around his head like a horse with a feed bucket.

Horse with bucket

He declined.

But his meds must have finally kicked in, because Mitch perked up for a bit (probably just a placebo effect and mental fortitude) and sat up with us in the cockpit as we soaked up the last bit of daylight.  The waves were around 4-5 then, and our trusty captain held fast at the helm while we watched the sun set.

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As the last bit of light dipped below the horizon, a loud ping rang out of the cockpit.  It was the same sound Phillip and I had heard on our last passage when we found the sheared bolt head.  Phillip and I looked at each other knowing it had to be another bolt.  But a deeper worry was the thought that it likely came from the same place.  Some plate or bracket or other immensely-important fastening device on the boat was giving way.  This time I didn’t look around the cockpit to find the bolt head that had flew to its watery death at our feet.  We knew it was a bolt head.  What was more important was where it came from.

I immediately started looking around the cockpit again, at shackles and pulleys, the bimini frame, everywhere.  But, the answer screeched out as us before I could find her.  Just as the boat heeled hard to port against a wave, the davits on the stern rail screeched and the dinghy swung to the left and clanged.

Here’s another shot of her portside from the day before.  You can see the davit arm reaching out over the back of the boat holding the dinghy up, and the outboard motor (with the green cover) was attached to the dinghy as well.  The dinghy itself weighed about 100-150 pounds, and the outboard another 150. 

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We all stared at her for a minute, thinking the same thing: it was the davits, those stupid, frail, stainless steel little rods holding up the dinghy and the outboard motor on the back of the boat.  But, it was as if we all wanted validation.  We waited in silence as the boat heeled to the starboard side and eased down the wave and another swell came toward us.  The davits squeaked a bit and we could see the dinghy nudging its way back to the right, but when the next wave came and sent the boat effortlessly over to port, we all watched as the davit brackets on the stern rail slid visibly down the stern rail to port side.  The davit arms swung to the left and clanged as the weight of the dinghy swung around.  If we wanted validation, we got it.  The davits were not going to hold.

We examined the davit bracket on the portside rail and found, sure enough, two bolts on it had sheared through.

New

This is the bracket the bolts were shearing off on, and by the end of it, it had slid about a foot to portside, almost around the corner of the stern rail.

There were only two bolts left in the bracket.  We began looking for spare bolts, all over the boat, to fill the holes but we couldn’t find one the same shape and size.  We had brought a lot of spare parts for the passage: primary and secondary fuel filters, oil filters, impellers, gaskets, fuses, belts, etc.  We felt we had really tried to think of everything that could possibly go wrong, but I have to say, replacement bolts for the dinghy davits just in case they started shearing through was just not something we had planned for.  We got creative.  We started filling the bolt holes with cotter pins for sails, allen wrenches, anything that would slide through and somewhat hold.  We also started tying the dinghy with any rope available, trying to stop it from banging to port every time we climbed a wave.

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We tied it every which way to try and stop the portside banging.  And, it seems it was the last physical act Mitch could stomach.  After that it was: Going,

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Going,

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Gone.

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Goodnight Mitch.

He was out.  Like a light.  Phillip said he had never seen someone so sick able to sleep so soundly.  Non-drowsy my ass.  Mitch slept like a baby.  Even admidst steady heeling left to right.  Note the gimbled lantern in this photo:

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We are heeled to port baby!

Phillip and I stayed up at the helm as darkness set in around us.  The wind screamed as it passed over the mast and through the cockpit.  It was blowing so hard it stung our eyes and made it hard to keep them open, particularly in light of the rain which, probably, without the wind, was only a steady dusting, but the gusts transformed it into pelting sheets.  The sound of the waves against the hull and the groaning and creaking of the boat as she tipped mightily over each wave became far more prevalent, almost haunting, at night.  As if our sense of sound was heightened.  Think how much easier it is to hear a pin drop in a pitch black room as opposed to one brightly lit and full of visual distractions.  Around 9:00 p.m., we heard our “pin” in the dark.  Another bolt sheared off the davit bracket and pinged loudly in the cockpit.  I would love to say Phillip and I shared a knowing glance.  We certainly locked eyes and shared a moment, but I can honestly say I didn’t know he was thinking.  I didn’t know what we were going to do.  Thankfully, Phillip did.  A resolve came over him, and he spoke in short, commanding sentences in a tone I had never heard from him before.  He told me to go down and wake Mitch, which I did without hesitation.  And, to Mitch’s credit, he woke instantly, shook off the nausea and came up to the cockpit.  I’m sure he could tell by the tone in my voice as well that things had changed.  We were in trouble, and there was no time for sickness.

We all sat in the cockpit, looking to Phillip.  He told us he thought the davits would eventually give out and the dinghy might take us down on port side.  We had to be ready to cut it off if that happened.  Neither Mitch nor I questioned him.  There was no need.  We agreed.  Altogether, the dinghy and outboard weighed about 300 pounds.  If that thing hit the water, it would easily pull the boat to portside, and with the way we were already heeling over waves, we couldn’t afford any “pull” to the left side.  We also had no way to pull her out of the water.  Wrestling 300 pounds up over the stern rail and onto the boat was not even a possibility, much less an option.  Nor was there anywhere to safely store the outboard motor (which was full of gas and oil) safely on the boat while we rode out the storm.  There was also a real concern that the dinghy could rip the entire stern rail off or, worse, rip a hole in the deck where the stern rail attaches, making sinking not just a possibility but a probability.  There was no denying it.  The dinghy had to go.  Phillip gave me the helm while he and Mitch went down below to round up anything we could use to cut the lines: knives, box-cutters, a hacksaw, anything with a blade.  We lined them up like surgical utensils on a tray near the companionway.  The davits continued to screech each time we heeled to port and the dinghy banged loudly as her weight swung around.  We knew it wouldn’t be long.

Finally, it was too much.  A huge swell tipped us over to port, and when the dinghy came swinging around the davits gave up.  They broke off the stern rail and the dinghy crashed into the water, outboard engine first.  The boat groaned and pulled hard to her portside.  It amazed me how sensitive the sailboat was.  The weight of the dinghy dragging in the water pulled hard on her and I could easily see now why Phillip thought it could tip us over, if the right wave hit.  The dinghy foamed and flailed in the water like panicked drowning victim, and the cockpit filled with the smell of oil and fuel.  The outboard was submerged, choking on waves and water, and leaking fluids everywhere.  The boat was heeled over and it didn’t help that we were all on the low-side trying to get to the dinghy, tipping her even further.  Phillip’s voice cut through the waves and wind with startling clarity: “Cut if off!”

Mitch grabbed a knife, I grabbed a hacksaw, and we started attacking the lines.  There was no time to try and untie or salvage them.  They were an easy casualty to save the boat.   But it was dark behind the boat, and we were struggling to see the lines and, worse, distinguish them from another mate’s hands or fingers.  Mitch was having trouble reaching the lines because he couldn’t get very far out over the stern rails.  I sent him to the high side of the cockpit with the flash light and told him to hold the light for me.  I climbed over the stern rail with one foot hooked back in the cockpit and reached out to the end of the davits to start sawing every line I could feel.  It was surreal.  Like we were a living episode of Deadliest Catch:

Deadliest Catch

The more lines I cut, the more dinghy made contact with the water and pulled us further over to port, but it had to be done.  I finally made my way up to the high side to cut the last of the lines on the starboard side.  One I could feel was particularly tough and when I first struck it with the saw, it sparked.  I pulled back, momentarily frozen, frightened, smelling the gas fumes that were still emanating from the outboard motor.  I shouted to Phillip, “I’m getting sparks!”  He reached back and felt the “line” I was holding.  Turns out it was the cord to the navigation light that was mounted on the back of the dinghy (much like brake lights on the back of a trailer).  It was a thick electrical cord running out to the nav light on the outer edge of the dinghy, which was still dimy lit, flickering and choking behind the boat, but too far to reach.  Phillip looked at me sternly and said, “Cut it.”

I bit down hard, clenched my teeth together and began sawing the electrical cord.  A few more sparks flew, but thankfully, nothing ignited.  Apparently, the cord was the last thing holding the dinghy on, because when the hacksaw finally made it through the last of the rubber and wire, the dinghy crashed violently in the water and began, finally, to pull away from the boat.  Lines were dragging helplessly from the back of the boat and, thankfully, Phillip had the fortitude to still think clearly in that moment.  “Get the lines in!” he yelled at us, knowing they could get caught in the propeller and put us in more danger.  Mitch and I snapped to attention and grabbed lines viciously, throwing them into the cockpit with reckless abandon.  We hit Phillip with several of them but he didn’t say a word.  He hunkered down, held the wheel and steadied the boat while Mitch and I pulled in the last of them.  Afterward, we all fell into a heap in the cockpit, drenched and shaken, but feeling more alive in that moment than we had the entire trip.  I doubt Mitch could even comprehend nausea at that moment.  Our bodies were feasting on adrenaline.  We sat there, our chests heaving in unison it seemed, gathering our thoughts and wondering if what just happened had really happened.  Phillip shined a light out into the sea as it to confirm our collective inquiry and there it was.  The dinghy.  About 50 yards away from the boat, lines floating around her like spindly fingers reaching back for the boat.  She was truly out there, detached from the boat and floating away.  We had really done it.  Cut her off.  The damn dinghy.  The boat breathed a sigh of relief as if she had just finished a forty-mile march and finally set her rucksack down to air her sweaty back.  Her heeling back and forth was now graceful, soothing almost, and we all finally appreciated how much she had been struggling with the dinghy on her back.  We breathed with her, equally relieved, but our faces were still heavy with worry.  We were hundreds of miles from shore, in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico, in the middle of the night, without a radio, and, now, without a dinghy.  And we were only half-way there.